


The Dark Queen

by CoffeeBanana



Category: She-Ra and the Princesses of Power (2018)
Genre: Adora Needs Therapy (She-Ra), Adora and Catra still have issues, Catra & Bow Friendship (She-Ra), Catra & Glimmer Friendship (She-Ra), Catra (She-Ra) Needs a Hug, Catra (She-Ra) Redemption, F/F, F/M, Fluff, Glimbow, Half Moon (She-Ra), Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Magicats (She-Ra), Mentioned Shadow Weaver | Light Spinner (She-Ra), Multi, Post-Canon, catradora, one year post-war, tying up loose ends
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-02-21
Updated: 2021-03-14
Packaged: 2021-03-16 03:28:25
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 28,079
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29569623
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CoffeeBanana/pseuds/CoffeeBanana
Summary: A year after the war, things are going well for everyone in Etheria...mostly. Unexplained groups of clones have been invading some of the villages around Etheria, and nobody knows who's responsible. When Catra and Adora get pulled into the chaos, they'll face demons they thought were firmly in their past.Also featuring: a mask with magical powers, lots of fluff and angst, and maybe the occasional cliff-hangerOr, my shot at how things could play out post-canon. (I suck at writing descriptions, but I promise it's more interesting than it sounds hahaha.)
Relationships: Adora/Catra (She-Ra), Angella/Micah (She-Ra), Bow/Glimmer (She-Ra), George/Lance (She-Ra), Mermista/Sea Hawk (She-Ra), Netossa/Spinnerella (She-Ra), Perfuma/Scorpia (She-Ra)
Comments: 8
Kudos: 64





	1. Is this too good to be true?

“No Light Hope, no more spiders…”

The hologram must not have heard Adora, because from the edges of Light Hope’s chamber in the Crystal Castle a wave of mechanical arachnids were moving towards Adora. She managed to take out a good portion of them with a bolt from She-Ra’s sword, but there were still too many advancing towards her. She tried to swing the sword again, but all of a sudden it turned into rubber duck. Panicking, Adora backed up, but the wall was right behind her. There was nowhere to run to. And the spider closest to her was now way too close. It reached out a leg and poked her in the arm as she tried frantically to summon her sword again... 

“Hey Adora,”

Adora sat straight up in bed, startled awake by her girlfriend’s sultry tone. Seconds later she relaxed, hearing Catra giggling at her. There was no crisis after all, it had all been a dream. And the feeling of being poked by a spider leg had probably just been Catra trying to wake her up from the nightmare. Adora groaned and fell back into bed, pulling the covers over her head to hide her embarrassment. It had been nearly a year since the magic of the Heart had been released to Etheria, since the first time she and Catra had kissed and professed their love for each other, and somehow, despite the fact they’d shared a bed for years in the Horde, she didn’t know if she’d ever get used to the feeling of waking up next to Catra—her girlfriend—every day. 

Catra’s laughter trailed off, and Adora felt a finger poke into her forehead. The touch was softened by the blanket she’d cocooned herself in.

“You’re such an idiot,” Catra said, her words interlaced with teasing and love.

Even now, as Adora peaked her eyes out from the blanket to see Catra staring at her, she was speechless. Her girlfriend was lying on her side, her head resting against her hand as her arm formed a triangle against her pillow. Adora found her eyes drifting to the lean muscles on Catra’s arms, her toned core peaking out from the baggy shirt of Adora’s she’d thrown on before bed, the strong muscles of her thighs. She wasn’t as bulky as Adora, but there was a strength there, one that Adora knew well. And now Adora’s feelings felt so enormous that she didn’t know what to do with them. 

Then again, that wasn’t entirely true. She did know some things to do…

Without warning, Adora threw off her blanket and rolled herself sideways, knocking Catra onto her back and straddling her. A tinge of triumph arose in Adora at the surprised look she registered on Catra’s face before an expression of amusement overtook it. After spending their childhood in constant competition, roughhousing, and playfighting, followed by years of fighting on opposite sides of a war, a part of their dynamic would probably always be about trying to win something. But these days the rewards, no matter which of the two girls won or lost, were a lot more fun. 

Using one of her elbows to brace herself against the bed, Adora used her free hand to grab one of Catra’s arms, which laid against the pillow, and pinned it there with the weight of her forearm. She leaned her face down, until Catra’s lips started to part for a kiss. Instead of obliging, she pressed a kiss to the side of her lips, to her cheek, to the side of her neck, and then poised her lips at the side of one of her ears. She felt Catra’s body tighten beneath hers, drawing in a sharp breath.

“Who’s the idiot now?” she whispered. 

Adora realised too late the tactical error she had made, as Catra’s free arm reached up and shoved her, reversing their positions so that Adora lay on her back, looking up at the woman of her dreams who was now on top of her. The one she still couldn’t quite believe was hers.

“Still you babe.” Catra smirked. And then she leaned down and kissed her. 

***

Suffice to say, they were late to breakfast that morning. 

Halfway through their plates already, Glimmer and Bow looked up knowingly as the girls walked in holding hands. Adora felt her face redden, but Catra seemed unphased. She gave Adora’s hand a quick squeeze before letting go and taking a seat at the breakfast table across from their friends. Adora took the chair beside her and focused very hard on filling her plate with food as she avoided her friends’ gazes. Luckily they didn’t make any comments about the whole being late thing, and she let herself relax as she listened to Glimmer and Catra bickering good-naturedly about Catra’s outfit for some upcoming ball. 

The conversation moved on to Bow gushing excitedly about what he’d learned recently from the tech classes he was taking with Hordak. The former leader of the Horde was definitely a strange choice for a teacher, but in an effort to advance technology across Etheria the princesses had mutually decided that it would be a good idea to offer some sort of advanced tech classes to anybody who was interested. Of course the original plan had been for Entrapta herself to lead the classes, but it had turned out that as brilliant as she was, teaching was not something she was particularly good at. The first lesson had almost ended the program entirely after Entrapta’s excitement had led her to believe it was a good idea to let novice-level students handle chemicals that were apparently a little too explosive if not dealt with under the proper conditions. As a fallback, it had been decided that Hordak would lead the classes, being that he was the only person who could almost completely follow what Entrapta was saying and that he had less of a tendency to overlook things that could potentially blow up.

As Adora listened to her girlfriend asking Bow questions about some tech gadget, a topic which honestly went over her head, it hit her how surreal this felt, the four of them getting along together. Nearly a year after the war, sometimes it still felt like a fantasy. 

It wasn’t like it had been easy at first to fold Catra into the group. She knew sometimes that her girlfriend still didn’t feel like she belonged entirely. But it made Adora happier than she’d ever been, probably happier than she’d ever thought she could be, to see her fitting in so well with the Best Friend Squad, knowing full well how difficult it had been for the other girl to let her guard down around other people for most of her life. 

But as much as the sight in front of her made her happy, if she thought about it too much she started to worry that it would all fall apart. Safety, happiness, comfort - those could all be fickle things. A part of Adora couldn’t help but wonder of this was all too good to be true. If at the end of every good thing there could only be disappointment. 

Adora was a few bites in when Catra elbowed her softly. “You good?”

Swallowing the bite of toast she’d been chewing too long, Adora nodded, “Yeah, just zoned out.” Mentally, Adora scolded herself. Why was she acting like such a sap this morning?

Catra’s gaze bore into hers a little longer than Adora was comfortable with, as if Catra knew that Adora’s response wasn’t the entire story. She probably did, to be honest. The two of them had spent most of their lives together, and Adora knew that sometimes that level of intimacy still made Catra feel uncomfortable, but for Adora it was nice on  _ some _ level to know that she didn’t have to carry her burdens alone. Even if that particular level was buried deep underground connected only to reality by a secret passageway she’d never give out the password to if her life depended on it. 

So yeah. In theory she loved having someone who knew her so well. In practice, admitting she wanted or needed help was something she was still working on.

But Catra also knew not to push her too far, and returned to her breakfast without pressing the issue. After that, Adora made more of an effort to integrate herself in the conversation, and she was laughing along with the rest of her friends when Glimmer’s tracker pad beeped. 

The pink and purple haired queen frowned. “Entrapta just sent a communication saying her satellites have picked up on a high presence of Prime clones in a nearby village.”

Bow frowned and peered over at the screen. “That’s the third location this week. Where are all of them coming from?”

Adora shrugged. The clone thing was concerning. It seemed like more and more clones were making their way to Etheria, although at present Entrapta hadn’t been able to pinpoint from where in space they were coming from. That in and of itself might not have been so concerning, since many of the clones now disconnected from the hive minds had been claimed by the rebellion. In fact many of them had proved useful in the rebuilding efforts of the planet. Except lately, groups of clones with no affiliation to the rebellion had been gathering in organized groups to attack various villages. And the groups seemed to be getting larger.

Catra’s tail swished back and forth. “Come on Sparkles, this was supposed to be our day off.”

Glimmer sighed. “If it’s anything like the last two times then it’s not going to take us that long to deal with. There’s no point bothering the other princesses for a disturbance that’s so close to Bright Moon.”

Catra scowled, but she didn’t argue. Adora found herself nodding, secretly excited to have something to do. 

“Best Friend Squad to the rescue?” Bow said hesitantly.

Glimmer, Bow and Adora smiled at each other. Catra stood up, throwing her hands up in defeat as she walked out of the room. 

“Fine,” she yelled as she went. “But if this cuts into my afternoon nap time I’m holding you all personally responsible.”

“Don’t worry,” Glimmer shouted after her. “I’m sure if the clones don’t take that long then Adora can find some other way to _distract_ _you_ from your nap.”

Adora didn’t know if she wanted to laugh or melt into a puddle. Glimmer and Bow got up to leave as well, and she stayed at the table for a moment, fighting a smile, enjoying the sounds of her friends’ laughter following Catra out of the room. 

*** 

Glimmer teleported the group into the Whispering Woods, maybe half a mile away from the location Entrapta had sent them. Adora had transformed into She-ra before the trip, so as the tallest of the group she stood on tiptoe to try and get a better view of what lay ahead.

“I can’t see anything but trees,” she reported. 

Catra laughed. “Duh. She-ra might be badass but she’s not taller than trees.”  
Adora frowned. “She is sometimes. Trees don’t just pop up one day twenty feet tall, they have to grow, so even cute little short people like you are taller than _some_ trees.”

Catra narrowed her eyes. “I am  _ not _ a cute little short per--”

“Guys,” Glimmer interrupted. “Can you please have this stupid argument later?”

“No,” Catra shot back, sticking out her tongue, but she and Adora fell silent anyways as the group started making their way through the forest. After a while, Catra motioned for them all to stop, her ears perked up. “Let me check something out,” she mumbled, then climbed up a nearby tree. 

Upon returning to the ground she provided the lay of the land. There were estimated to be around fourty clones, with maybe ten or so surrounding the front gate, a few patrolling along the other outside walls, and the rest scattered throughout the village. After a brief discussion, the plan was for Bow, Glimmer and Catra to take out the few guards pacing the perimeter first, as quickly and quietly as possible. Adora wasn’t thrilled about having to wait out in the forest while that step of the plan was carried out, but Bow had reasonably pointed out that as She-ra she was taller than the walls of the village so she would have given away the element of surprise. Next they would regather and launch a group attack from the front of the city, moving inside the walls once they took out those that stood guard out front.

It didn’t take long for Adora to grow antsy as she stood hidden near the edge of the woods while her friends worked on phase one of the plan. Luckily as She-ra she had an easier time focusing on the overall goal of the mission instead of overthinking the finer details of the plan. Whether that was from magic or the pure adrenaline of turning into an eight-foot tall warrior princess, she had no idea.

When her friends returned after a few minutes, the group exchanged quick glances and started moving in the direction of the clones. Right before before they reached the edge of the trees, Glimmer took one of Bow’s hands, teleporting them to the woods on the other side of the clearing facing the entrance to the village. Then Adora and Catra awaited the signal to approach. 

The idea was to draw the clones away so that Adora and Catra could attack from behind. Since the end of the war, Bow had come up with a range of new arrows that Catra loved to tease him about. Adora and Glimmer on the other hand knew not to doubt Bow’s ingenuity after the time his sonic arrow had been the unlikely saviour to their mishaps at Dryll. He let an arrow fly now, and it shot jolts of electricity through the clone it made contact with, disabling it. 

Adora watched it fall, and exchanged a quick look with Catra, both girls smiling. Adora felt anticipation for the upcoming fight course through her. Obviously, for the sake of Etheria, Adora didn’t  _ want _ to always have to rush into a battle at a moment’s notice, but she couldn’t deny the rush it gave her. Especially now that she had Catra at her side instead of as her opponent. 

Glimmer ran out from her spot in the trees a few feet away from Bow, and sent a blast of sparkles towards the nearest clone. It collided midair with a bolt sent from the clone in question, but she quickly sent a second blow that hit her opponent squarely in the chest. Bow let another arrow fly, this time actually an adaptation of the sonic arrows that Adora and Glimmer had teased him about all those years ago. It let out a high-pitched frequency that only the clones could pick up on and masked the sound of Adora and Catra’s footsteps as they rushed in to join the skirmish.

Adora swung She-Ra’s sword, slicing into the clone nearest her. The body slumped before her. She saw Catra pounce on another clone out of the corner of her eyes. Then Adora picked up on footsteps behind her, and spun around to swing at the approaching attacker. The clone managed to dodge her attack, but Glimmer teleported in just in time to take it out from behind. Turning back around, Adora noted that there were two clones left in play. Seconds later one was wrapped in a net, courtesy again of Bow’s arrows, and Catra moved quickly to finish that one off. 

“I’m going in,” Adora shouted, confident in her friends’ abilities to take out the remaining free clone. 

“Right behind you,” Catra grunted as she flipped the trapped clone and scratched through its control panel. 

Inside the walls of the abandoned village it became a lot harder to discern exactly how many clones might be hiding out. Adora moved quickly from one clone to the next, always having to look around corners before making her next move and often having to dodge hits coming from behind that only the instinct of the years of growing up as a soldier allowed her to steer clear of. She would have liked to take out all of the clones at once with a giant blast of She-Ra’s sword, but when fighting in close quarters it was too unpredictable to unleash such a large amount of magic, and although the village was presumed abandoned she couldn’t be sure that there were no civilians hiding out in the ruins that she’d risk harming by accident.

Catra had indeed followed close behind her, and she fought close to Adora. The two girls were always aware of one another without having to communicate their next moves. Adora had briefly seen Glimmer and Bow rush into the fight as well, but now her only indications that they were still in the fray were the occasional grunts and shouts she picked up on.

It became obvious early on that they’d underestimated how many clones had been inside the village to begin with. There were too many corners amidst the dilapidated ruins for their opponents to hide behind. But it wasn’t until too late that Adora realised there were more than the four of them would be able to handle. 

A circle of clones had started to form around her and Catra, who were fighting back to back at that point. Adora fired a controlled bolt of energy off of her sword, cutting down a group of the clones that were approaching on her side of the circle. She glanced back at Catra to try and signal a plan, but the other girl had jumped into the air, flipping herself to land on the shoulders of the clone opposite her, quickly deactivating it with her claws and hopping onto the shoulders of one of its neighbors. 

Adora hissed as she felt something slice across the skin of her arm.  _ Since when did the clones have claws?  _ Luckily a quick stab of She-Ra’s sword took care of that particular attacker. She was about to move forward and take out another clone nearby when movement in her periphery caught her attention. Catra had jumped off of the last clone she’d deactivated, but hadn’t noticed another one moving towards her from behind. 

Adora didn’t have time to warn her. She was too far away to step in. All she could do was watch in horror as the clone picked up her girlfriend and tossed her through the air until she crashed against the stone wall bordering the village and slumped to the ground.

“Catraaaaaaa!” Adora barely registered the sound of her own voice screaming. Her blood felt like ice and she suddenly felt unsteady on her feet.

She tried to run towards Catra, but more clones were closing in. She ducked and rolled to avoid a series of blasts aimed in her direction. Glimmer teleported in next to her and somehow she and Adora managed to dispose of the clones in their immediate vicinity. Adora was going through the motions without thinking about it. All she wanted was to get to Catra.

Adora dealt a killing blow to the last clone around her as Catra blinked her eyes open. She was trying to drag herself up off of the ground, and Adora was racing towards her and the two clones closing in from the either side.

_ No. No no no no, I’m not going to make it.  _

Catra had managed to stand, but seconds later another clone was upon her. Adora heard a painful cry as the clone plunged a blade into Catra’s stomach. Adora could see the blade sticking out through Catra’s back for a split second before it was yanked out.

Adora had almost reached Catra as an arrow and a flash sparkles took down the two clones next to her girlfriend, but Adora feared that it was too late. Catra’s face was blank as if in shock. A dark stain was spreading across her red shirt, blood gushing through the hand she had moved to try and cover her wound.

The world felt like it was stuck in slow motion as Adora watched her fall.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Apologies for the cheesy fic name. I uuuuh...Wanted to focus more on writing than titles?  
> Anyways I hope you enjoy. Planning on posting about once a week (if all goes well), but we'll see. Motivation during COVID is a fickle thing, am I right?
> 
> Also... I wouldn't hate having a beta reader if anyone were to offer their services haha. 
> 
> Thanks for reading <3


	2. Just let me wake up next to you

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here's chapter 2! It's a wee bit longer. Hope you enjoy!!

The last few steps separating Adora from Catra felt like they took an eternity. Adora sank onto her knees. She pressed her shaking hands over the gaping wound on her girlfriend’s chest and took a deep breath. Everything would be fine, she just had to calm down and let She-ra’s magic do its work. Catra would be fine.

_Then why isn’t anything happening?_

A fresh wave of panic seized Adora, and she felt something flicker inside her. Caught up in her worries, it took her a moment to make sense of what was going on. Then reality hit like a skiff crashing into her. She was losing She-Ra.

_No. This can‘t happen now._

“For the honor of Grayskull!” Adora raised her arm expectantly, waiting to summon She-Ra’s sword anew, but nothing happened. She reached out again with her mind, but couldn’t grasp onto her usual connection to the magic. “For the honor of Grayskull!” she tried again, but it was still no use. 

Terror overwhelmed Adora’s thoughts, and for some reason words she’d heard once about a year ago popped into her head. They were Shadow Weaver’s words, from when they’d been seeking out the failsafe in Mystacor. _Catra, she distracts you. Confuses you. Haven’t you hurt each other enough?_

And they had hurt each other. So many times over the years. What if Adora couldn’t even help her now, after everything? What if Catra died _now_ , when they were supposed to be at the beginning of their future together? It would be all Adora’s fault that she’d let her feelings distract her.

 _It’s not true._ Adora tried to shake herself out of those thoughts. She remembered a conversation from a few months ago, when Catra had asked her out of the blue how she’d first managed to transform into She-Ra again after having broken the sword. Adora had found herself blushing, realising that Catra hadn’t even known it had been _because of her_ . That she’d just loved her so much, even if Adora hadn’t yet been able to put those feelings within herself into words, that she’d _had_ to transform into She-Ra to save Catra on Prime’s ship. And as she’d told Catra the story, she’d come to the realization that really it had been love that had created She-Ra’s new form for her. Catra had always been her strength, not her weakness. Catra had called her a sap for that, but she’d been smiling. Then Adora had teased her back about how she too had helped save the Universe with a kiss, and Adora didn’t remember much beyond that except that the resulting pillow fight had evolved into a flurry of kisses and the wonderful feelings of Catra’s body moving against hers.

She had no doubts anymore about how much she loved the dying girl in front of her. But could it be that love that was tearing her away from the focus she needed to transform? After all this time, had Shadow Weaver had been right?

It was exhausting looking back at all of the terrible things Shadow Weaver had said over the years, trying to determine what was true and what had just been manipulation. Adora knew she’d be unpacking that for the rest of her life. 

She couldn’t imagine a rest of her life without Catra though.

Adora felt a presence beside her, but barely registered it until Bow asked “Adora, what’s going on?” 

“I c-c-can’t d-do it.” Adora gasped. She hadn’t realised until now that she was crying. “I can’t h-h-heal her.”

Adora thought that maybe Bow said something else to her, but something inside of her had just _broken_ , and she felt her body fold over Catra’s, her ear pressed to the other girl’s chest, trying desperately to pick out a heartbeat. Unfortunately, she wasn’t the one with cat ears, and all she could hear was the noise of the clones surrounding them. 

Then the dirty ground beneath her was suddenly replaced with a smooth tiled floor, the sounds of the battle overtaken by a series of quiet beeps from a ways away. Arms on either side of Adora pulled her off of Catra, and she tried to fight them off, but then she realised that it was just Glimmer? She’d teleported them back to Bright Moon, into the medical room. Doctors and nurses stared at the group in a moment of shock before suddenly moving into action. Someone pressed a load of gauze onto Catra’s wound, and others lifted her carefully onto a bed.

Adora was still kneeling on the floor sobbing as they wheeled Catra away. 

***

The next few hours were the worst of Adora’s life. 

When she finally managed to stop crying, her mind couldn’t wrap itself around what was going on. She felt like she was watching a video of somebody else’s life playing through her mind. But the detachment from reality was far from being a comfort. It just pierced her heart anew every few minutes when the weight of what was going on hit her again. Glimmer and Bow sat on either side of her on a hard bench in the waiting area, and that seemed ridiculous somehow. Almost every piece of furniture in Bright Moon was far too soft, yet this bench outside the medical room where people had to wait for potentially terrible news was less forgiving than the hardest parts of the old Fright Zone.

Ridiculous.

Because Catra was probably dying. Adora had seen the wound. How did someone come back from that without She-Ra’s magic? Sure, the doctors were sorcerers that had trained at Mystacor, but that magic wasn’t as strong as She-Ra’s, even since Adora had restored the Heart’s power to Etheria. For all Adora knew, Catra had died already, and they just hadn’t come out to tell her yet. And as if that weren’t bad enough, Adora didn’t even have a cushioned seat to comfort her.

Adora heard laughter bubbling out of her. She knew that was wrong, especially when she made eye contact with Bow, but his concerned expression just made her laugh harder. Because this couldn’t be real anyways, could it?

For some time after that, Adora was quiet, focused. She tried to attach herself to She-Ra’s magic again. That evolved into her shouting over and over again, “For the Honor of Grayskull,” until she fell into Glimmer’s arms, shaking with sobs once more.

When someone finally did come out with news, Adora didn’t even register it. But then Glimmer was squeezing her arm too hard and Bow was shaking her, saying “Adora, did you hear that, she’s going to be ok!”

Adora’s head snapped up at that, and she looked to see one of the doctors standing there. He seemed tired, but was smiling. “She’s not awake yet, but you can come sit next to her if you want.”

Adora nodded, and followed the doctor without saying anything. He was still chattering away, and she could hear Bow and Glimmer pipe in with questions every now and then, but she wasn’t paying attention. Catra was ok. 

When her eyes found Catra’s sleeping form, Adora could only think about how wrong the scene was. The medical wing was colourless compared to the rest of Bright Moon, cold metals and pale blues interspersed with plain whites. Catra looked too small, laying on her side with one slightly bent arm stretched out and the other curled into the pillow. Someone had covered her legs and torso with a thin blue blanket, which seemed wrong. Catra usually ran hot, rarely sleeping under the covers in their bed upstairs. 

But Adora could see her chest rising and falling, and as she sank into the chair pulled up beside the bed, grasped Catra’s hand, and felt its warmth, a tiny piece of the Universe seemed to shift back into place. 

***

The world was heavy when Catra came to, like the air was pressing on her body, holding her down like a weighted blanket. Even opening her eyes felt like it would be too much effort. But her thoughts were unbothered by her current physical state. She had no idea where she was or how she’d gotten there, but she felt...safe. 

Still, it would be nice to piece together some of the puzzle. Unable to open her eyes, she allowed her other senses to assemble a tableau of her surroundings. Her head pressed on a pillow far less soft than she was used to and which smelled only of fabric soap. Sounds of footsteps passed by where she rested every now and then, but aside from that the room was largely quiet. There was a blanket pulled up over her, which she was glad for. She was cold. And finally, there was the sensation of a hand gripping hers. Ah. That explained the feeling of safety.

“Adora?”

“Catra?” Adora gasped. Catra felt a familiar hand run softly through her hair. “Catra, you’re ok. It’s going to be ok.” Adora sounded like she was trying to convince herself more than anything.

 _Why wouldn’t it be ok, dummy?_ Catra wanted to ask, but that seemed like too many words for now. Part of her wanted to drift back to sleep, but now her interest was piqued. What was going on, and why did Adora sound so worried?”

What wasn’t Catra remembering?

She tried to reach with her free hand and comfort Adora. She wanted nothing more than to open her eyes and wrap Adora in a hug, but her body wouldn’t listen. Was something wrong with her? The feeling of safety was slipping away, and Catra remembered suddenly the clones in the abandoned village. She must have gotten injured or something, but why wasn’t she in her own bed then? Surely She-Ra could have healed her and brought her home to rest. And why did she feel so strange?

“Where—?” Catra tried to finish her sentence but it was still too much effort. 

“You’re in the medical wing at Bright Moon. You were hurt pretty bad, but the doctors were able to heal the worst of your injuries and they’re confident you’ll make a full recovery. You’ll probably have to stay here a few days though.” Glimmer’s voice was soothing but she got to the point without sugarcoating it. Catra appreciated that. “They gave you some medicine to dull the pain,” Glimmer added.

Oh. That explained why she felt so out of it. “It’s good stuff,” she mumbled.

Catra heard Glimmer and Bow chuckle in response, but the laughter she wanted to hear was missing.

“Adora?”

“Yeah? I’m right here.” She squeezed Catra’s hand.

“I’m ok.” She knew Adora needed to hear it from her.

There was a pause, then, ”Catra, I’m so sor--”

”Not your fault.” Of course, Catra still couldn’t entirely remember what had actually happened, but she didn’t doubt for a second that her words were untrue. There was no way Adora wouldn’t have done everything in her power to protect Catra, but the blonde could find a way to blame herself for anything.

”I—” Adora broke off as Catra managed to crack one eye open and turn her neck slightly to meet the worried face fixed upon her.

“It’s not.” Catra let her eyelid fall shut again. It was too bright.

“Ok,” Adora responded after another long pause, and Catra knew from the tone of her voice that it most definitely was not ok, but she didn’t have the energy to argue right now.

Bow broke the silence. “Heeeeey, soooo, we’re gonna leave you two to talk for a while or whatever, um...but let us know if you need anything.”

“We’re really glad you’re ok Catra,” Glimmer added.

Catra smiled “Hmm, you guys are the best. Love yaaa.” 

“Wow, whatever drugs they gave you must have been _strong_ ,” Glimmer teased, “I am soooo using that against you when you’re feeling better.”

Catra opened her eyes again briefly, in time to see Bow elbow Glimmer, who squeaked in response.

“We love you too Catra,” Bow said.

“Yeah. feel better soon Horde scum.”

Footsteps moved away from the bed, and then she and Adora were alone. 

At that point Catra was starting to feel a bit more, well...normal. She registered a dull pain in her stomach which was a bit annoying, but it also seemed like moving would be easier now. She opened her eyes and focused on Adora, who sat tensely on the edge of her chair. Seeing Catra’s gaze, she tried to smile, but acting had never been Adora’s strong suit.

“I’m so glad you’re ok,” the blonde started. “I-I tried to heal you b-but it wouldn’t work, and then I lost She-ra, and…maybe it’s not my fault but it feels like it is. Like I should have been able to do more, and I’m so, so sorry Catra.” Here Catra tried to protest, but Adora was stuck in her rant and didn’t notice. “I just—I was so scared, but maybe if I could have just focused—”

”Adora, stop. It doesn’t matter. I’m fine.” She gently pulled her hand from Adora’s and rubbed the empty side of the bed beside her. “Just come lie down with me” 

After some hesitation, Adora complied, gingerly settling herself on the bed beside Catra. She moved slowly, as though she was afraid of hurting Catra if she didn’t. They laid in silence for a while, just looking at each other. Catra could see the fear that was still projecting from Adora’s eyes.

She wanted to say something, anything. But the right words wouldn’t come to her. Things felt heavy again. Her eyes drooped, and she tried frantically to blink away the impending sleep.

“It’s ok,” Adora whispered, and pressed a kiss on her forehead. “Go back to sleep. I’ll be here when you wake up.” 

“Promise?”

“Promise.”

***

Adora made good on her promise, but soon after Catra woke she made some excuse about needing to shower and then Catra barely saw her for the next two days. Melog was Catra’s constant companion, which some of the nurses didn’t seem thrilled about, but she didn’t see the issue since they were quiet and stayed in the vicinity of her bed at all times. 

Glimmer and Bow visited often too, and when on the first day when Catra inquired about Adora’s whereabouts the two of them shared a look of concern.

“She’s um. Trying to transform,” said Glimmer.

“Into She-Ra,” Bow added unnecessarily. 

Catra tried to sit up, then winced. The pain was definitely worse today. She sighed, lying back down, and said, “All this time? It’s been hours since I last saw her.”

“Yeah, well...you know Adora.” Glimmer’s tone made it clear that she too was exasperated with her friend’s behaviour, but Catra didn’t hold it against her and Bow that they’d been unable to talk her out of it. Catra _did_ know Adora.

Catra rolled her eyes. “She still wants to heal me, doesn’t she?”

“She said she could tell you were in pain,” Bow replied.

Catra sighed. It wasn’t like she could argue with that. But still, she hated it when Adora got like this. 

“We’ll try to get her to come see you,” Glimmer said.

“Thanks.”

Catra didn’t really think her friends would have much luck, but Adora did show up that night, right as Catra was falling asleep. By then Catra was too tired to probe her girlfriend’s mind, and when she awoke Adora was gone again. The second night Adora wasn’t there when Catra drifted off to sleep, but she awoke halfway through the night to see Adora’s body stretched out next to her, snoring softly. Catra tried to stay awake to talk to the other girl, not wanting to wake her when she obviously needed the rest, but Catra’s healing body also demanded more sleep, so she dozed off after a while. When the sun streaked in through the windows to wake her, Adora was again nowhere to be seen.

“This is ridiculous,” Catra said when Glimmer and Bow stopped in that morning. She was sitting up eating breakfast. Well, picking at it mostly. The medicine she’d been given seemed to have killed her appetite. “She’s obviously overworking herself. And what if something happens some day and she can’t ever get She-Ra back? It’s going to drive her crazy, she’s so convinced she needs She-Ra to be important. And I can’t even talk to her right now because she’s clearly delusional—”

“Who are you calling delusional?” asked a voice from the doorway. And then in walked...She-Ra. Her arms were folded across her chest and she was glaring at Catra.

Glimmer and Bow exchanged a quick look then started backing out of the room. Cowards. Catra knew that just seconds ago they’d been thinking the same thing as her. Just because Adora had managed to tap into her powers again didn’t mean she didn’t have a problem.

“So She-Ra’s back?” Catra asked. She tried not to sound bitter. She really did. 

“Don’t sound so unhappy. Now I can heal you.”

“And if I don’t want you to?” Catra knew how petty she must have seemed. But she was cranky and in pain. And Adora was acting as though she didn’t know why Catra was frustrated with her, which was even more infuriating. For as much as Catra joked about Adora being an idiot, she wasn’t that dense. Most of their worst arguments over the last year had been about Adora’s constant drive to take on more work than was good for her. 

But if Adora had been mad before, now she was fuming. “Don’t be stupid.” She-Ra’s eyes punctuated the statement by glowing menacingly. 

Catra narrowed her eyes. “Adora, you don’t need to do this. Sometimes people get hurt, then they heal. I’m already going to be fine.”

“So you’d really suffer for who knows how long just to prove a point.”

“I—” Catra had been about to keep arguing, but she broke off at something in Adora’s expression. She remembered how scared Adora had seemed looking at her just days ago in the same bed she was now sitting in, how much she’d hated to see Catra suffering. And Catra realised that at this point, with Adora already transformed, it would have been selfish of Catra to make Adora see her in pain any longer. So she gave in. “Ok fine. Heal me.”

She-Ra walked up to the bed, laid her hands on Catra’s shoulders, and let the magic flow through her. Catra felt instantly better, and when it was done she looked into Adora’s familiar blue eyes, She-Ra having faded, ready to play nice and make up with her girlfriend. Adora didn’t seem to share that sentiment. She dropped her hands from Catra’s shoulders, turned, and walked out of the room. Healed or not, Catra was still too tired to go after her right then.

***

Over the next week, Adora barely talked to Catra. It wasn’t entirely clear whether the blonde girl was mad or just avoiding her because she knew Catra would try to call her out on her crap, but she had developed a remarkable skill of disappearing every time Catra slipped into a room with her. Catra honestly didn’t even know where Adora was sleeping, but Glimmer had assured her that she _was_ sleeping. Or at least Adora was sleeping according to _Adora_ , for whatever that was worth.

And as for what Adora was doing with all her time? Turning into She-Ra. Training with her sword. Over and over and over again. Catra wanted to confront her about it, to force her to slow down and talk things out. But she had no idea how to start when Adora was this worked up. 

Also, Catra was quite honestly still a little mad herself. She’d put in so much effort over the last year since the war trying to get Adora to slow down and take time for herself. To realize that she didn’t always need to be doing something or saving someone. And now? This felt a lot like going back to square one. Maybe even square minus one.

So Catra did the only logical, mature, rational thing someone could do in her situation. 

She avoided Adora right back. 

Since she was healed and fully functional anyways, she spent a few days helping with the rebuilding efforts of Salineas like she’d been scheduled to do. She poured too many hours into her work planing the various reconstruction efforts around Etheria and fortifying Bright Moon’s defenses. She ate meals with Glimmer and Bow and made sure someone dropped off trays of food for Adora, following up later to make sure she’d actually eaten. She discussed at length with Entrapta over her tracker pad what information the tech genius had managed to find so far on the clones.

So when the princesses and their allies met up at the end of the week to discuss plans for how to deal with the clones, it was the first time Catra had seen Adora for longer than a few minutes in a while. 

“Hi,” Catra said uncertainly as Adora took a seat beside her. She was unsurprised to see dark circles nesting under those familiar blue eyes.

Adora simply nodded, and seconds later Glimmer called the meeting to order. So Catra had to bite her tongue instead of going off on her girlfriend like she’d been about to. Probably for the best. 

“Entrapta, what do we know so far about the clones?” Glimmer’s voice projected across the war room table. Micah sat beside her, eyes scanning through the page of talking points he, Glimmer and Catra had put together before the meeting. He smiled at his daughter as she sat back down beside him.

Entrapta stood. “Hordak and I have detected a definite increase in clone presence on Etheria and we’re trying to locate where in space they might be coming from and figure out what’s drawing them here. We’re currently working a sort of alert system that will let us know when know space ships enter the atmosphere and hopefully track where they’re landing so we can figure out where their base of operations is on Etheria. But for now our only source of intel is the drones we’ve been sending out that have been picking up on high levels of clones in some of the areas, and the congregations seem to be getting even larger, like the group that hurt Catra last week.” 

Catra saw Adora flinch at Entrapta’s conclusion, and she placed a hand on Adora’s leg to try and reassure her. Adora looked down at her lap wide-eyed, like she didn’t know what to do with the gesture, and after a few seconds Catra gave up, pulling away and crossing both her hands across her chest. 

“Ok but like, do we know who’s in charge of them?” Mermista asked. “Pretty sure they’re not all just suddenly thinking for themselves.”

“Why couldn’t they be?” Scorpia asked. “Wrong Hordak and Hordak and a few of the other clones that have joined Entrapta at Dryll can all think for themselves.”

Bow stood up. “Yeah, they’re autonomous. But none of them are plotting organized attacks like we’ve been seeing.”

Perfuma laughed nervously. “It’s not like we’ve never seen a clone start a war before. Are we all just forgetting that Hordak—” 

“The data says it’s very unlikely,” Entrapta cut in. “Hordak’s programming had a defect and it still took him years to adjust to being separated from the hive mind before he started to build up the Horde on Etheria. He’s an anomaly.” She said _anomaly_ the way most people might say hero. “The clones we’re seeing have been here for about at year at most.”

“Right,” Glimmer said, taking control of the meeting again. “So our main goal at the moment is to find more information, as well as dealing with the groups of clones that might pose a threat to the citizens of Etheria.”

Catra cleared her throat. “When I talked to Entrapta before the meeting she said the biggest group of clones she’d detected at the moment seemed to be a troupe a little ways outside of Erelandia. If everyone agrees then that can be our next target? Hopefully if there aren’t too many we can do some recon once we take out the clones.”

Adora nodded. “That’s a good idea. I can lead a group out there tomorrow?”

Catra and Glimmer shared a look. There was no way they were sending Adora out right now. 

Glimmer bit her lip. “Um, aaaactually Adora, I was thinking you’d stay here. You know, with She-Ra being a little, um...unpredictable lately?”

“She-Ra is fine. I’ve got that problem under control.”  
_And how is the not sleeping problem going for you,_ Catra wanted to ask, but she wasn’t _quite_ pissed enough to put her girlfriend on blast in front of the entire group. 

“Ok, then Bow can lead the mission.”

Catra saw the queen hesitate, and knew Adora wasn’t going to like where this was going. With a mission of this scale, Glimmer was likely going to stay behind to coordinate any behind-the-scenes details that might be necessary. With Adora also out of the running, that meant that the two other most logical people to lead the mission would be Catra or Bow. While Catra had more experience heading off expeditions from her time with the Horde, in this scenario she figured Bow was the better choice for several reasons. 

First off, there was no reason to upset Adora more than she already was. There was no way that Glimmer could expect her to take this well when Catra had basically almost died last time she’d faced the clones. But more importantly, while Catra was used to running things behind the scenes along with Glimmer at Bright Moon, or coming up with a strategy when the four members of the Best Friend Squad went on missions by themselves, she hadn’t had much opportunity to lead a larger group of princesses into battle. That alone wasn’t an issue, except for the fact that Catra was pretty sure some of them still didn’t entirely trust her judgement, namely Mermista and Frosta. And to be honest, Catra was a little apprehensive about confronting a huge group of clones again too. She only remembered flashes of her final moments before passing out during the last attack, but that was enough.

But Glimmer wouldn’t have hesitated if only to agree with Adora, and the blonde knew it.

“No,” said Adora. “You can’t send Catra. She just got injured.”

Catra rolled her eyes. “Adora, you healed me like a week ago. I’m fine.”

“Adora, I’ve made my decision,” Glimmer replied. “I need Bow here to interpret any tech-related concerns we might have, since Entrapta will be on the ground to investigate any technological advances the clones might have.” 

To Catra that seemed like an excuse rather than the real answer, but she’d have to ask Glimmer later. Adora for her part, didn’t question it any further, but as the rest of the princesses chimed in developing battle plans she refused to contribute anything else to the meeting.

When the meeting was over, Adora stormed out without so much as a word to anyone.

***

Catra finally retired for the night after hours spent hammering out the details of their mission with Glimmer, Bow, and Micah. She hadn’t seen Adora since the meeting and had no idea where she was. She knew she should probably seek her out tonight and not let this ridiculous tension between them get any further out of control, but she was basically falling asleep on her feet already, so she resigned herself to putting it off until tomorrow. 

Then she opened the door to their bedroom to see Adora lying on their bed. She was sprawled on her stomach, the corner of the blanket tugged over her body but with half of her limbs sticking out of the covers. Melog was sprawled at her feet. The sight brought Catra an overwhelming sense of relief, a sense of comfort that she hadn’t even realized she’d been missing. 

Catra quietly got ready for bed, careful not to wake Adora, but when she finally approached the bed she realized that the blonde girl’s breathing was soft but not quite the even breaths of sleep. Catra settled herself in bed beside her girlfriend, wanting to take her in her arms or even to reach out and comb her hair off the side of her face, but she didn’t know if that would be welcome or not. Luckily Adora chose that moment to dramatically roll over, eyes closed, as though pretending to be asleep. Her movement brought her close enough to Catra that it would have felt awkward for her not to throw her arm over Adora, who tangled her legs in Catra’s in turn. 

Melog repositioned themself to lie on Adora’s other side and fixed Catra with a look. _Your mate is hurting_ , they meowed. 

_I know. But she won’t let me help her._ Catra thought back. 

_Try_.

Catra sighed, then tucked a strand of hair behind Adora’s ear. “I didn’t think you’d be here,” she said.

The silence was long enough that Catra was pretty sure Adora was going to stick with the whole pretending to be asleep thing, but then a small voice said “I didn’t think I’d come.”

“Why did you?”

The pause was even longer this time, but Catra waited patiently. 

“I missed you,” Adora finally whispered.

Catra found that response a bit irritating considering the fact that Adora had clearly initiated this whole avoiding each other thing, but another look from Melog stopped Catra from pointing that out. 

“I missed you too,” Catra pressed a kiss to Adora’s cheek. “But can I ask you something?” She felt Adora tense, and she laced their fingers together, giving Adora’s hand a gentle squeeze to calm her down. Catra considered her next words carefully. Normally Catra was the one running away from her feelings and tough conversations. She wasn’t used to being the one trying to put things back together, and wasn’t sure where to start. She didn’t entirely know where Adora’s head was at right now, and she didn’t want to spook her. Still, they needed to talk. And they couldn’t do that if Adora kept leaving. “Please don’t run away again when you wake up?” Catra finally whispered, “I miss waking up next to you too.”

She heard Adora take a deep breath, then she squeezed Catra’s hand back. “Ok.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N : So there you go. You didn’t really think I’d kill Catra, did you? Just needed to set some dramatic tension to get the story under way... From here on in the story will switch between Adora and Catra’s POVs, possibly some other POVs as things go on. From here on out though it’s mostly Catra’s story though.


	3. THWACK. WHAM. SLAP.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW: Description of panic attack, anxiety

When Adora walked out of the meeting, she was pissed. Melog followed at her heels. which sent another rush of annoyance through her, as though Catra was checking up on her like some kid who needed supervision. She knew that assessment wasn’t fair, seeing as Catra didn’t tell Melog where to go. They made their own decisions. But Adora had been watching her friends tiptoeing around her all week, and she was sick of it.

In Adora’s defense, she knew her behaviour wasn’t strictly healthy. She just didn’t know how to stop. So it was unsurprising that, although she hadn’t had a particular destination in mind when she’d left the meeting, she ended up back in the training room. 

She turned into She-Ra and started moving through her usual exercises, practicing her sword form against battered old dummies, but even her magical alter-ego couldn’t quell the anxieties wreaking havoc inside of her. Catra was going into battle again tomorrow and there was nothing she could do about it. She wasn’t even allowed to be there, since everyone was treating her like some fragile thing that might break. 

So she kept swinging the sword, hoping that at some point she would find a magical movement that would quiet the rising tides of anger and panic that were dueling for control of her mind, but that didn’t seem to be in the cards for today. If anything, she was making things worse, although she still couldn’t bring herself to stop the THWACK, WHAM, SLAP of the sword hitting its dummy target.

In her mind, she saw Catra being thrown through the air. THWACK. She saw her hit the stone wall and crumple like there was no life left inside of her. WHAM. She saw the blade sticking out from her back, and the shock in her face as it was pulled out. SLAP. She saw Catra lying broken on the floor of Prime’s ship, barely breathing.

Adora tried for one more hit, but the sword disappeared before her eyes, and her viewpoint of the world got a couple feet shorter. She-Ra was gone. _No. Not again._

Adora felt the panic pressing down on her chest, and suddenly she had to get out of the training room. She saw her hands shaking as they pushed open the door, and she felt herself breathing faster and faster as she tried to calm down, to convince herself everything was ok. All of her racing thoughts were telling her that was a lie. She tried to move down the hallway towards her room, where at least she’d have the peace to break down alone, but she had made it less than halfway before her legs started to give out on her, and she leaned against the wall, sinking to the floor and then drawing her knees into her chest and wrapping her arms around herself. She was barely aware of Melog settling down beside her, mewling in comfort but unable to break through the disconnect that was growing between Adora’s mind and the world around her.

“Adora?” came a tentative voice after some time. On some level, Adora knew that the voice was familiar, but it wasn’t familiar enough to register in her current state. She only barely had the energy to keep breathing in and out. Then a body sat down next to her on the floor, red pincers resting on its lap. Scorpia. “Adora, are you ok? Do you want me to get Catra?”

Adora managed to raise and shake her head, then buried it in her knees again. A part of her did want her girlfriend’s shoulder to lean on, but another part didn’t want to face her right now.

“Ok,” Scorpia said. “Is it ok if I just...sit with you?” Adora nodded, and the two of them sat in silence for a while, Scorpia fidgeting every so often, as if it was hard for her to sit still. After a while, Scorpia said, “I’m just going to...talk, if that’s ok with you? Sometimes...sometimes Perfuma does that for me when things feel like they’re...too much, and...it does help me.”

Adora forced another nod, and Scorpia started telling some elaborate story about getting lost in the woods on a recent date with Perfuma. Most of the details were lost on Adora, but the act of trying to force herself to follow Scorpia’s mildly chaotic storytelling and the presence of her chipper voice were enough to ground Adora’s thoughts, and although she could still feel herself trembling a bit her breathing seemed to have returned to normal. Or at least she was able to breathe without constantly having to remind herself how to. 

Eventually, Adora looked up and forced a weak smile. Scorpia broke off uncertainly, and Adora laid a brief hand on her claw. “Thank you. That did help.”

Scorpia rubbed her free claw behind her head, looking down shyly. “No problem. Everybody needs a friend sometimes.”

Adora felt herself smile more genuinely at that. Most of the time, she thought of Scorpia more as Catra’s friend. It wasn’t like she and Adora had ever spent much time alone together, and they had a bit of a rocky history considering Scorpia’s past feelings for Catra. But now Adora thought she’d probably enjoy getting to know her better.

“Do you...want to talk about anything?” Scorpia asked.

“I-I don’t think so.” Adora stretched her legs out, testing them. Satisfied, she pushed herself back to her feet. “I’m just going to go back to my room, try and get some sleep. Thanks again, Scorpia.”

Scorpia nodded. “Ok. Alright. Um… I guess I’ll get going then.” She looked around uncertainly. “The kitchen is that way, right?” she asked, pointing in the wrong direction. 

“Other way,” Adora gave a final smile, and Scorpia gave her an awkward sort of salute as she started walking away. 

Adora headed in the opposite direction towards her room, trying not to think about the possibility of Catra being there. She was tired of avoiding her girlfriend, and she longed for the comfort of sleeping in her own bed right now, but she wasn’t ready for a confrontation. Luckily the room was empty when she arrived.

The next few hours were a bit of a blur. She still felt like she wasn’t quite a part of the world. She tried to keep herself from thinking about much of anything, focusing instead on the softness of the pillowcase brushing her cheek and the silky feeling of Melog’s fur as they cuddled into her. One second she was too hot and the other too cold, so she compensated by sticking half her body out from under one corner of the blanket she’d dragged over her back.

She thought she might have dozed off for a while, but she was awake when she heard Catra come in. She feigned sleep at first, knowing she wasn’t up to the argument that she was pretty sure awaited her, but Catra’s words were gentle. Her actions soothing. And Adora felt guilty for having avoided her for so long. She knew it made no sense, avoiding Catra because she was scared of something happening to her and never being able to see her again, but ever since Catra’s injury nothing had seemed to make sense to Adora. 

Still, those were problems to deal with another day, so she let herself be comforted by Catra’s presence next to her, and eventually managed to drift off into a dreamless sleep for the first time all week.

***

When Adora finally opened her eyes, she was surprised to find Catra already awake, staring down at her as if in deep thought. Normally Adora was the early riser, but she supposed this was the inevitable result of sleeping terribly all week. Catra’s face morphed into a half smile when she registered Adora looking at her, but it didn’t reach her eyes. Adora’s stomach tightened. There was no avoiding it anymore, the conversation she’d been dreading all week. 

Adora sat up, crossing her legs and facing Catra, who was in a similar position. Melog had disappeared, probably in search of breakfast. Or maybe that was over already, judging by how much sun was pouring through the window.

Catra was still studying her, and Adora opened her mouth, trying frantically to find something to say, but there was nothing. She didn’t have any excuses or explanations for her behaviour over the past week, not really. And yet she knew she owed Catra something. Only the longer she sat without talking the harder it seemed to be to find anything to say.

It felt like hours had passed when Catra finally broke the silence. “I don’t know what to say, Adora.” Her voice was flat, as though she were deliberately trying to keep emotions at bay, and she had finally looked away from Adora’s face, instead staring at her hands as she pulled at the blanket beneath them. “I’m trying not to be mad, because I don’t think that’s going to help, and I know this week has been hard on you. But you have to give me something. Anything. Just tell me what you’re thinking, please.”

“I-I don’t know what to say either.” Adora felt last night’s guilt creeping back. It was obvious that Catra was trying so hard to be impartial, to keep her cool. To be someone Adora could lean on. Someone to trust. But Adora still hadn’t learned to let other people in on her own shortcomings.

Catra sighed heavily, leaning back on her hands and letting her eyes fly back to Adora’s with a new intensity. “How about we start with you walking out of that meeting yesterday. That wasn’t like you.”

“I’m sorry.”

“I don’t need an apology, I need you to—” Catra broke off, stared intently at the ceiling for a moment, took a deep breath and started again. “It scares me when you’re like this Adora. When you shut me out. It feels like...like you’re leaving me all over again.“ Adora opened her mouth to protest, but Catra held out a hand, signalling that she wasn’t done. “I know that’s not fair. It’s not what’s happening. I know you were scared about the me after clones, and freaked out about losing She-Ra, but I just wish you wouldn’t always feel the need to and handle things on your own. I wish you wouldn’t shut me out of how you’re feeling, because it hurts me too when you’re upset Adora.”

For a moment, Adora was speechless. For all the time that Catra had spent over the past year getting better control of her emotions, Adora had never heard her say so much about her feelings at once. Normally it was blunt one-liners after Adora pestered her to open up, or small self-deprecating comments that Catra probably thought went unnoticed. Adora always noticed. But now she realized that maybe she hadn’t noticed enough.

So Adora opened her mouth and let her side of things fall out. “I’m sorry. I’m so so sorry Catra. I didn’t mean to push you away. I mean I knew I was doing it, but it wasn’t about you. It’s just...I knew you’d be mad that I was training too hard, and once I started I just couldn’t stop, and I knew you’d be upset when I talked to you so I just shoved it all in and I shouldn’t have but I—” Adora broke off, realizing there were tears down her face. Catra reached out and wiped them away, but the gesture only made Adora cry harder, and then without really understanding how she’d gotten there, she was lying with her head in Catra’s lap, sobs wracking her body while Catra’s hands ran through her hair, up and down her arms, then gently across her face, wiping more tears away. 

When she finally managed to stop crying, Catra spoke again. “I’m sorry too. You’re right. I was mad. And I should have put that aside earlier and made it clear that you could talk to me. But I guess you can take the girl out of the Horde but not so much the Horde out of the girl.” She paused to laugh at the expression Adora shot her. “I just mean that we both need to get better at this communication thing.”

Adora bit her lip. “I want to be better too. The thing is....I just don’t know how to put it into words how scared I was, looking at you and thinking it might never see you alive again. I thought I was scared when I pulled you off of Prime’s ship, but this...after everything we’ve been through, after we found our way back into each other’s lives despite everything...The thought of losing you now...I’ve never been so terrified. And I guess I didn’t know how to put that into words. So I put it into…” Adora broke off, putting her hands together into fists and miming the action of swinging her sword. 

The action had the desired effect, and Catra threw her head back in laughter. “You are _such_ a dork. I can’t believe how much I love you.” Then she softened, looking down at Adora again. “I’m ok though, Adora. I know it was scary, and I can’t imagine...well maybe I can. I know I’ve never been more terrified than when we were at the heart and I thought you were slipping away from me forever. But trust me, Adora, I’m not planning on letting anyone take me away from you that easily.”

Adora inhaled sharply. “Then please don’t go out again today.”

Catra looked away, closing her eyes. “Adora, I wish I didn’t have to go. I really do. But Glimmer wants me for this mission, and I-I want to prove that I can do it.”

Adora sat up, twisting to face Catra again. “Of course you _can_. I just wish you didn’t have to.”

Catra gave a half-smile. “I don’t know if this helps at all, but I’m scared too Adora. I know how close I came to dying, and there was a time when...there was a time when I wouldn’t have thought anything about it. But I have so much more to lose now.” She looked at Adora meaningfully. “And I’m sure as hell not letting anybody take it from me so soon.”

“Ok.” Adora reached out and wrapped Catra in a hug, which the other girl returned without hesitation. “I trust you.”

When they pulled away, Catra was regarding her evenly, like she was still trying to piece something together, but the look lacked the accusation of her earlier stares.

“You never answered my question about the meeting,” Catra said eventually. “Why did you leave? Was it just that you were scared about the plan for today?”

Adora sighed. “I don’t know. It was sort of that, and mostly that I just felt...out of control. I mean before you joined the rebellion…” Adora paused, anticipating some sort of negative reaction from her girlfriend for dredging up the past, but none came, so she continued. “I used to be in charge of making most of the plans. Or at least if I wasn’t in charge I was involved. And mostly I’m fine not doing that. You have great ideas, you’re _so good_ at this kind of thing, and to be honest I kind of prefer the rushing into battle part as opposed to the whole coming up with a plan bit.”

Catra snorted. “You don’t say? Literally all of your plans involved _rushing in with no plan_ before I joined you guys.”

Adora shoved her girlfriend playfully. “Ok, but the point is that yesterday didn’t feel fun. It felt like you and Glimmer were trying to...handle me or something. Like I was a kid, or someone you thought was about to break. And I know I was being stubborn and that you were right not to send me out right now. It’s not like my head’s in the right place for a mission.” She paused to give a humourless laugh. “But it still didn’t feel good.”

Catra’s expression had sobered. “That’s...fair. We can definitely work on including you more in our plans in the future.”

Adora was searching for a way to respond when her stomach let out a huge growl.

“Come on,” Catra laughed, climbing out of bed. “We’d better get you some food before She-Ra comes out and takes vengeance on us for starving her host.

Adora rolled her eyes. “That’s not how She-Ra works.” But she too got up and followed Catra to the door. 

As they left the room, Adora took in a deep breath, letting it flow slowly out of her body. To her surprise, she realised she did feel….better. There was still a nervous twinge when she thought about Catra facing more clones later today, and her brain felt like it was stripped of some protective coating that normally kept her sane, But she did feel a bit lighter. More free. Maybe there was something to this talking thing after all.

Then Catra slipped an arm around her, leaning against her as they walked towards the dining room, and Adora felt better still. 

Ok. There was definitely something to this talking thing.

***

Adora wasn’t the only one who felt better after talking. Catra’s good mood lasted through breakfast and most of her morning’s preparations for the mission, helped by the fact that Adora didn’t leave her side the entire time. But then the time came to say goodbye, and Adora kissed her a bit more intensely than she normally would in front of so many people, holding onto her a bit too tightly as Catra tried to pull away because they really needed to get going. And it reminded Catra of what was awaiting her, and of how it was her responsibility to get everyone back safely. 

That was the main difference between her role leading missions now versus her time in the Horde — the fact that instead of just barking orders and telling herself she didn’t care what happened to the cadets she sent out, now she didn’t have that luxury. Sure, the princesses might still get on her nerves from time to time, but these were also the people who’d accepted her after everything she’d done. At first, maybe that had just been for Adora’s sake, but now Catra had an individual relationship with most of them. She couldn’t pretend she didn’t care anymore.

So once Glimmer had teleported them all into the forest outside of Erelandia and disappeared, Catra felt the weight of the mission fall squarely onto her shoulders. She saw Spinerella and Netossa waiting patiently for instructions, Mermista standing and looking at her fingernails as though bored already, Scopia distracted by something Perfuma had said while the flower princess blushed softly, Entrapta with her eyes glued to her screen as though she’d forgotten their were other people around her, and Frosta looking as though she was already smashing clones inside her head. Catra vowed to get all of them out of this safely. 

“Alright,” she said, “We make sure the town is secure first. The clones are supposedly located to the east, but we can’t be sure that none of them have infiltrated the town until we check it out. And nobody goes off alone. If we have to separate, we stick in pairs _at least_. Got it?”

”We got it,” Mermista drawled. “We went over this like five times already.”

Catra tried not to let her fur brustle as she turned around and started to lead the way. She ended up walking in between Entrapta, who was somehow not bumping into any trees as she walked with her eyes trained on her tracker pad, and Scorpia, who elbowed her excitedly.

“Look at us, Wildcat, the Super pal trio at it again.”

Catra’s face stretched into a tight smile. She often felt guilty when Scorpia brought up things like that from the past, remembering the way she’d once treated her friend. She knew that the princess didn’t say these things to hurt Catra. If anything it was the opposite. But Catra felt that of all people, she’d been the least deserving of Scorpia’s forgiveness even though she’d given it so easily. Maybe especially since she’d been given it so easily.

Luckily, she was saved the job of having to figure out how to respond when Scorpia continued on. “Hey, uuuh...How’s Adora?”

Catra regarded her friend curiously. “She’s...doing alright. Why?” 

“Oh I just...She seemed pretty upset after the meeting yesterday and I—” She broke off as they reached the end of the clearing looking onto the village. “It’s not important, we can talk later.”

Catra nodded, filing away her feelings. She needed to focus. 

Luckily a quick sweep of the village revealed no anomalies, and the few townspeople they’d talked to had all seemed in good spirits, apparently not knowing there was a giant group of clones in the vicinity. The only slightly auspicious comment they’d received was from some old man going on about some group of “young hooligans with a demon baby”, which Catra passed off as the normal ramblings of a senior citizen. 

As the group then headed east towards the clones, Catra tried to dissuade her rising anxieties by barking orders. “I meant what I sad before, we stick in pairs. Spinerella and Netossa, Perfuma and Scorpia, Mermista and Frosta. Entrapta, you stay out of the way until we’ve taken out the clones.”

“What about you?” Perfuma asked. “You don’t have a partner.” 

“I’ve got Melog,” she replied as the magical shape-shifter appeared beside her. “We’ll join whichever group needs help. We won’t know until we get in there. And anyways, it might not be possible to stay in our assigned pairs. There will be a lot of clones. The goal is for all of us to stay together as much as possible, but if it comes to it we all retreat at my call. No exceptions.” Catra realised that by the end of her speech her voice had risen a little more than she’d intended, and her tail was sticking up straight. Yeah. She was definitely on edge.

Spinnerella smiled kindly. “We’ve got it Catra. Don’t worry.”

“Yeah, no problem boss.” Scorpia added.

“Let’s SMASH some clones,” Frosta piped in, layers of ice starting to form giant fists around her hands.

Catra smiled, letting their encouragement boost her up. “Let’s do this.”

***

This time, taking out the clones was a piece of cake. Despite the fact that there were more clones this time than during Catra’s last altercation with them, the combination of having more princesses available to fight them and the fact that they were fighting in a more open space with far fewer things for the clones to hide behind made it easy to take them all out. The battle was over before Catra knew it, and as she stood up from having slashed through the control panel on her last victim she looked around in satisfaction at the fallen machines around her. Melog let her cover of invisibility fall away, and she glanced around, seeing matching smiles of triumph shining from her friend’s faces. 

“It’s done,” Catra pressed a button on her earpiece that would send the message both to her friends back in Brightmoon and to Entrapta, who had been waiting nearby.

A minute or so later, the purple-haired girl joined the other princesses and Catra in the clearing, looking around at the destruction in mild surprise. “Wow, there were even more than my drones picked up on.”

Catra frowned. “Yeah. We definitely need to figure out who’s organizing them, and soon. So take your time and look around for any clues that might help. We’ll keep watch in case there are any more clones hiding in the woods.”

The princesses spread out, forming a perimeter around the remains of the clones’ ruined hideout. It was more of a formality than anything, since they’d definitely made enough noise to have either drawn any clones that might have been lingering in the forest towards them or to have driven them away, depending on their motives and how committed they might have been to the cause. Still, Catra wasn’t about to let her guard down. She paced around the ruins not far from Entrapta, looking for anything odd that might have stood out on the ground around her while keeping her ears focused on the nearby trees. 

After about ten minutes, she picked up on a noise in some nearby bushes, and gestured to Mermista, Frosta, and Scorpia who were nearby to cover her as she crept closer. Catra walked over to the edge of the forest, her ears trained on the leaves she’d seen rustling a moment ago, but she didn’t pick up on any mechanical sounds, so she figured it was just an animal. She was about to retreat when all of a sudden the bushes shook again, more violently, and Catra reacted instantly, leaping on the figure that fell out of them and restraining the hands of the distinctly human shape beneath her before they had a chance to attack. Realising they’d been caught, the captive let out a yelp, and looking down at the short blonde hair of the scrawny body lying under her, Catra realised she recognized it.

She kept one hand securely around the captive’s wrists, then reached down to his collar and yanked him up, glaring at him sideways as she held him in place. “What are you doing here Kyle?”

Scorpia, who was of course less suspicious than Catra by nature, piped in cheerfully when she realised who the intruder was. “Oh wow, Kyle buddy!” She walked towards him, lowering her tail that she’d previously raised to defend herself from their potential attacker. “I haven’t seen you since...well golly, since before the end of the war I guess.”

Catra exchanged an uneasy glance with Mermista, who reached forward to drag Scorpia back. “Be careful,” she water princess mumbled. “We don’t know why he’s here.”

Scorpia’s brows furrowed in confusion. “But it’s just Kyle. It’s not like he’s a threat.”

At that Catra had to laugh. She wasn’t wrong. But where Kyle was...his friends usually followed. Catra tightened her grip on Kyle’s wrists, pulling him back so she could hiss into his ear. “Where are Lonnie and Rogelio?”

“Wh-wh-what? I mean wh-who?” Kyle stuttered unconvincingly. “How would I know?” He gave a forced chuckle. “I haven’t seen them in ages.”

Catra rolled her eyes, fighting back a smile at the predictability of his words. Kyle had to be the only person on all of Etheria who was a worse actor than Adora. “Come on Kyle, I know you’re not alone, so just—” she broke off, as the sound of a twig snapping behind her alerted her to a new presence walking through he forest behind her. 

Catra swivelled herself and Kyle around in time to see Lonnie and Rogelio emerge from the cover of the trees. They stopped at the sight of three princesses surrounding them, then their eyes fell on Catra, who held one of her hands close to Kyle's neck, claws extended.

“Hands in the air,” Frosta yelled at the newcomers, and both the girl with dreadlocks and her part-lizard companion obliged. 

“Geez Kyle,” Lonnie complained, “Didn’t we tell you _not_ to get too close?” Then she fixed her glare on Catra. “Let him go. He’s not going to hurt anyone.”

Catra knew that. And she was pretty sure the other two meant no harm either, but she had to be sure. She’d heard that the trio had escaped from the Horde before the end of the war, and that they’d been making their own way through the world since then, keeping to themselves she imagined, after childhoods full of trouble they’d never asked for. Of course Catra could empathize. But she had to be completely certain her friends would be safe before she let them go. 

“What are you guys doing here?” she asked Lonnie. 

Rogelio growled, the arms raised above his head waving as he tried to gesture something too, but he fell silent when Scorpia took a step towards him, the black garnet’s electricity crackling around her claws. Catra knew the last thing her friend would want was to hurt the people they used to fight alongside, but her loyalty made her follow Catra’s lead. 

Lonnie sighed. “We just wanted to see what was going on. We’ve been tracking the clones for weeks, trying to find out what they’re up to. We’ve heard from lots of the villages we’ve passed through that there have more and more sightings, and we wanted to get to the bottom of it. We tracked them here yesterday, and we were hanging back, trying to come up with a plan, when we heard you guys show up and start fighting them. Kyle was _supposed_ to stay hidden while we gathered intel.”

Kyle made a sort of awkward sideways eye contact with Catra and smiled. Catra rolled her eyes in response, then released him, shoving him towards his friends. Lonnie reached forward and caught him before he tripped over his own feet. Catra didn’t entirely trust the trio yet, but they were definitely outnumbered, and it wasn’t like giving Kyle back to them was going to give them an upper hand. 

Catra sheathed her claws and took a step forwards, placing herself unarmed in between the three people backing her up and the three people she’d grown up with. A gesture of good faith. 

“So,” she said, looking at Lonnie, who had always been the brains of their operation, “Did you find out anything? About the clones?”

Lonnie narrowed her eyes. “Like we’d tell _you_ if we did.”

“Look,” Catra started, then broke off as her eyes caught sight of something crawling out of Rogelio’s backpack. 

“What’s that?” screamed Perfuma. Catra didn’t know when she’d joined them, and part of her was annoyed. There might still be real threats in the forest, and now it was just Spinnerella and Netossa left standing on guard. But she bit her tongue, not wanting to start a conflict in front of their sort-of-hostages.

“It’s baby Hordak!” Scorpia exclaimed, looking at the imp that had crawled onto Rogelio’s shoulders.

“Ew,” Mermista cut in. “Hordak spawned?”

“Uh, I don’t know,” Scorpia said. “Not exactly? I think he was some kind of failed attempt at Hordak trying to clone himself? But he was basically like a spy for Hordak back in the Horde. One time he even…”

Catra tuned out of Scorpia’s ramblings, figuring she’d likely heard the story before. She focused on the trio in front of her, watching as the imp leaped from Rogelio to Lonnie, who took him into her arms. The princesses had largely relaxed their tense stances from earlier, and as a result Lonnie, Rogelio, and Kyle had relaxed a bit as well. They stood close together, eyes flicking around uneasily, but they didn’t really seem to have their guard up anymore. Catra took it all in, surprised at the emotions the sight of them evoked within her. The three had clearly only grown closer since leaving the Horde, and together with the weird little imp they almost seemed like some little dysfunctional family. 

She felt...happy for them? Weird.

And as she watched the imp reach out and climb onto Kyle’s back, the boy practically giggling as the strange creature tickled his neck, Catra thought she might also feel some sort of yearning for what they had. Like maybe that family dynamic was something she might want with Adora some day. But that was a topic for another time. 

Scorpia had finally finished her story, and Catra almost laughed at the confused expressions on Mermista and Frosta’s faces. Perfuma was looking kindly at her girlfriend, but she seemed a little lost too. 

Catra took a step backwards, towards her friends, and gestured for them to do the same. 

“Uh, we’re just letting them go?” Mermista asked.

“They’re not a threat.” Catra looked at Lonnie. “I’d really... _We_ ’d really like it if you’d come back with us and share anything you’ve found out about the clones that might help. We’re trying to figure out who’s behind the recent attacks, and any information you might have gathered could be helpful.

Lonnie took a step forward, arms crossed. “You’re seriously acting like we have a choice? Like you’re not going to pounce on us again the second we try to walk away?” 

Catra shook her head. “It’s up to you. We’re not going to force you to do anything you don’t want to do.” She hesitated, then added. “I don’t do that anymore.”

“She really doesn’t,” Scorpia agreed.

Lonnie stared at her for a long time, like she was trying to uncover the hidden meaning behind Catra’s words. Catra couldn’t blame her. Eventually though, she took a step back, and turned towards her friends. The three of them huddled together in discussion, the imp slipping back into Rogelio’s backpack, head popping out the top of it with an uneasy smile that made Catra’s teeth crawl.

Finally, Lonnie turned back around. “Fine. But this doesn’t mean I trust you. I just think that you _might_ be the lesser of two evils right now.”

Catra shrugged. That was good enough for her. 

***

Glimmer was a bit surprised when she showed up to teleport everyone back and there were three more bodies in the group, but she took Catra’s explanation in stride, offering her hand to transport them back first. Catra went along with them, both to keep an eye on them and provide some level of familiarity, for whatever that was worth. 

She’d barely recovered from her usual wave of post-teleportation vertigo when she felt Adora’s arms wrap around her tightly and a kiss pressing into her cheek.

“Adora, I’m fine,” she said, a little embarrassed as she caught sight of Lonnie smirking at her from behind her girlfriend. “We uh, have company.”

Adora straightened and turned around, registering the presence of her old Horde mates. “Oh! Um...hi!” she said awkwardly, shooting Catra a look of confusion. 

Kyle grinned back. “Hi Adora, good to see you!” 

“Yeah, you too Kyle!”

Lonnie and Catra locked eyes at that, sharing a look of understanding that could only come from the mutual exasperation of having a person they cared deeply for with way too much trust and a minimal sense of self-preservation. Both girls smiled briefly in acknowledgement, then looked away just as quickly. It wasn’t like they’d really ever been friends. 

By that point, the rest of the group had been teleported back by Glimmer, and Adora leaned into whisper in Catra’s ear. “So, why are they here?”

“I’ll tell you in a second,” Catra mumbled, regarding the trio that huddled awkwardly in front of her, eyes wide as they took in the glamour of Bright Moon’s war room. Catra remembered how overwhelming the castle had seemed at first with all its bright colours and overall sense of suffocating cheeriness. She knew that if they wanted to gain as much information as possible she needed to make them feel comfortable. 

“You guys hungry?” she asked.

Kyle opened his mouth to speak, eyes eager, but Lonnie slapped a hand over his mouth. “We could eat,” she said casually.

Catra nodded. “Hey Scorpia,” she called. “Want to show these guys the kitchen? Grab them some food?”

Scorpia beamed. “Of course! It’s this way, just follow me!” She led them out of the war room, turning in the wrong direction when she reached the hallway.

“Dear,” Perfuma called out after her, “It’s the other way.” Scorpia seemed not to hear, and Perfuma shot a sheepish smile back to where Catra and Adora stood. “Don’t worry, I’ll show them where it is.”

As the group wandered away, Catra’s ears picked up on the beginning of their conversation.

“Is it just me, or is Catra _nice_ now?” Kyle asked.

Rogelio growled something that seemed like agreement, while Lonnie shot back, “Sure. All it takes to heal a former Horde captain’s jackass complex is She-ra’s magic pussy.”

Catra felt her cheeks warm. From beside her, Adora looked over. “Why does your face look like that?”

“No reason,” she mumbled, embarrassed. 

“Oh.” Adora’s face fell, and Catra immediately felt bad. Things had been so strained between them recently, and she couldn’t handle her girlfriend thinking she was keeping something important from her, so she sighed and relayed back what she’d heard. 

Adora burst into giggles. “If I’d known that was all it took, I’d have made my move years ago.”

“Shut up,” Catra elbowed the other girl, but she was fighting a smile. 

Maybe things weren’t back to normal yet between her and Adora, but at least they seemed to be heading that way. 

If only life were ever that simple for Catra.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Soooo. Catra and Adora are on good terms again....I hope that lasts and nothing else comes between them....hmmmm. I've said too much. hahaha. 
> 
> Idk why but I really liked the idea of Scorpia comforting Adora, because I just think she'd be super awkward but she'd really want to help and she totally probably got lost which is the only reason she found Adora to begin with. Also there's not really much out there about Scorpia and Adora interacting so I thought that dynamic would be a bit new.
> 
> And we have an appearance from everyone's favourite polyamorous trio, more in the next Chapter.
> 
> Anyways Hope you all enjoyed!


	4. Magical whispers, tiny bots and girlfriends with swords

“So...” Adora said awkwardly, glancing across the table at her childhood friends. Beside her, Catra leaned casually back against her own chair. Too casually, Adora thought, like she was trying to appear more at ease than she really was, but she doubted anyone else noticed. On Catra’s other side was Scorpia, who looked as though she wasn’t quite sure why she was there. Most everyone else had cleared out of the war room to give them some space, except for Glimmer, who sat a few seats away in silent observation. Adora cleared her throat and spoke again, “You have intel for us?”

It had been decided that Adora was the best equipped to question the unexpected visitors, in theory to make the group feel more comfortable. Considering it had been years since she’d really talked to the three people sitting opposite her now, she doubted it would be much use. They certainly didn’t look like they trusted her. 

Eventually Lonnie sighed and whispered something in Rogelio’s ear. The lizard-man opened up the backpack resting in his lap.

“Oh yeah,” Catra mumbled, “I forgot to mention—“

Catra broke off as something crawled out of the backpack, and Adora felt her eyes widen when she recognized Hordak’s imp sitting on the table. It swivelled its head around to fix Adora with a weird stare, green eyes glowing as it cocked its head to the side like some possessed demon. She really wished Catra had  _ not _ forgotten to mention that. 

“Oh,” Adora said lamely. “Hi?”

Lonnie rolled her eyes. “Impy here is who we’ve mostly been sending out to gather data on the clones so we don’t have to get too close. He’s good at climbing through the trees without being noticed.” She ran a gentle hand over the imp’s head, and it turned to look at her. She nodded, and it crawled across the table, stopping in front of Adora.

Adora tried her best not to wince as its mouth opened, playing a recorded message. “...Glory be to the Dark Queen…” said a mechanical voice, undeniably belonging to one of the clones. The recording was obscured by some sort of rustling sound, then, “You have your orders. We attack Erelandia tomorrow at nightfall. You know what you’re looking for.” 

“Was that...Octavia?” Catra asked.

Lonnie nodded, beckoning the imp back to her. “Yep. We saw her a little while after that, with a few other soldiers wearing what looked like Horde uniforms with the insignias ripped out or scratched off. We couldn’t get enough of a good look at the group to identify any of the others. This was yesterday, so I assume the threat to Erelandia has been handled since you guys managed to obliterate those clones outside the city.”

“What if there are more though?” Glimmer cut in, her eyes looking past Adora to where Catra sat. Adora tried not to be bothered that once again she wasn’t her friend’s first choice for tactical plans anymore. Sure, Catra had said they’d stop excluding her, but it wasn’t like she’d had much of a chance today to speak to Glimmer alone yet. 

Catra leaned forwards. “Did you guys see any more clones in the area?” All three of their visitors shook their heads, and Catra relaxed back into her chair before continuing. “It’s probably fine. But maybe we can send out a few people tonight to watch over just in case.” She looked to Adora, seeming to mull over her next words carefully. “I mean honestly I’m exhausted. But maybe She-Ra can lead a group out.”

_ Oh, so now She-Ra’s only good for the missions where nothing is actually going to happen? _ Adora tried to ignore the bitterness of her thoughts. At least Catra was trying to make good on her promise.

“Okaaay,” Glimmer said slowly. “We can figure out the details later. There’s still a few hours before dark.” 

Trying to ignore her friend’s complete lack of confidence in her, Adora tried to focus the conversation back on the matter at hand. “Ok, so there are ex-Horde members involved in whatever this group is planning, and they’re taking orders from someone they refer to as the Dark Queen? Do we know what Octavia was talking about when she said they knew what they were looking for?”

“No clue,” Lonnie replied.

“Probably nothing good,” Kyle added unhelpfully. 

Scorpia was tapping her claw on the table. “I just don’t understand why the old Horde members would still be trying to destroy Etheria. I thought we got through to most of them when we started rebuilding the Fright Zone into the new Scorpioni Kingdom. I know a bunch of them decided to go off on their own, but I figured at least they’d be done with fighting.”

“Maybe one of them is the Dark Queen?” Adora wondered.

“That doesn’t add up,” Catra said. “I can’t think of any old Horde members who’d be able to organize an operation of this scale.”

Adora raised an eyebrow. “And how many people in the Horde do you think knew about you before your rise to power?”

Catra scowled. “Enough people. And that was different. I didn’t set out on my own and start up an entirely new operation. I had...my own misguided motivations for what I did. But to build up a whole new army in a time of unfounded peace? There has to be some kind of reason for someone wanting to do that, and I can’t think of anybody who’d really have a motive to do that at the end of the day. Most of them were just soldiers. Brainless followers.”

“Gee, thanks,” Lonnie shot back sarcastically.

The fur on Catra’s tail bristled. “Oh I wasn’t talking about you guys. You all escaped before the war ended anyways, Scorpia told me. I only said most of the Horde was—“

“Guys,” Glimmer interrupted. “This isn’t exactly productive.”

“Catra’s right though,” Scorpia said. “There wasn’t really anyone in the Horde who I could see leading some kind of uprising either.” 

“Ok, then where did this Dark Queen come from?” Adora asked. 

Nobody seemed to have an answer for that, and the group fell into an awkward silence.

Eventually Lonnie stood up, the imp resting on her shoulder. “Look, this has been...interesting, but we’ve told you all you know, so we’d like to leave now. I hope you guys can get a handle on this, because to be honest these clones are really becoming a nuisance, but this isn’t our fight.” She stared around the table uneasily, as if expecting someone to stop her from leaving.

“We’ll walk you out,” Adora said, standing and grabbing Catra’s hand to drag her along too. 

Lonnie nodded, and the trio waved goodbye to Scorpia and Glimmer, then followed their old squad mates out into the hall. There was an awkward moment when they all reached the entryway. How did you say goodbye to people you’d known your entire life but had no particular desire to see again? It wasn’t like Adora had anything against them, but they were just...different people now. They lived in different worlds.

Surprisingly, Catra was the one to break through the tension, holding out her hand towards Lonnie. “Thank you guys for coming. Seriously. I know you had no reason to trust me after...everything. But if you guys ever need anything, we owe you one.” She paused, then added, “Stay safe out there.”

Lonnie grabbed Catra’s hand and shook it once, firmly but quickly, then stepped back towards Kyle and Rogelio. She looked back at Adora and Catra. “You guys too. Take care.” The group turned to leave as Adora waved, but at the last minute Lonnie turned to fix Catra with one last smirk as they left. “Try not to screw that up, eh?” she said, looking pointedly at Catra’s hand, which was holding Adora’s again. “She’s way too good for you Catra.” 

Catra cackled, throwing her arm around Adora. “Don’t I know it.” 

***

The next morning, Catra woke up abruptly as the bed bounced aggressively beside her. Seconds later, Adora crawled over and promptly collapsed on top of her. It took a moment for Catra to piece together what was going on. Then she remembered that her girlfriend had been up all night patrolling Erelandia with Glimmer. 

“Hey,” she protested weakly. “You’re crushing me.”

“Don’t care. So tired.” 

Catra laughed. “Everything went well then?”

“Mhmph. No clones. All good. Sleep now.”

“Okay princess.” She pressed a quick kiss on the top of Adora’s head, then wiggled out from underneath her girlfriend. She spent a few minutes trying to snuggle up and fall back asleep, but Adora had quickly dozed off and was snoring, so she gave up and headed to the dining hall in search of breakfast. 

When she arrived, Bow was sitting there holding a tracker pad in front of a plate of half-finished pancakes. Surprisingly, Glimmer was also there, leaning heavily on Bow’s shoulder with her eyes closed. 

“Sparkles, you’re still awake? Adora passed out in like a minute.”

“No, I’m not,” she mumbled without bothering to open her eyes.

Bow chuckled softly, giving his girlfriend a fond look before turning to address Catra. “Entrapta has news for us about what she found yesterday. Or at least she  _ said _ she had news, and then she ran away from her computer screen, shouting something about a timer.”

Catra nodded, starting to load food onto her plate, and Bow placed the tracker pad at the end of the table so it was within everyone’s view. 

After a few minutes, Entrapta popped back up on the screen. “Sorry Bow! Just had to check on something. Oh hey Catra!” Catra waved as the princess continued on excitedly. “So I finished analysing the upgrades that seem to have been carried out on the clones. The main changes were in their information processing systems. Since they’re no longer connected to Prime basically they should be autonomous but instead they were rerouted to feed information to a new source.”

Bow frowned. “Ok, so the Dark Queen must know how to modify tech. Or she must have people working for her that understand tech?”

Entrapta beamed. “That’s where things get even more interesting. The streamlined design for the video- and audio-capturing mechanisms are based off of the circuitry I’ve streamlined for more efficient—” 

“— English Entrapta.” 

Entrapta shot Catra an annoyed look in response to the interruption and switched to her most condescending tone. “The tech they used is my design. Hordak taught his students that material a few weeks ago.”

Catra had to force herself to keep her voice steady as she responded. “You let Hordak teach his students how to make technology that could be used against us?”

Entrapta’s voice crackled through the tracker pad again. “Well he taught them how to design the camera and microphone, but the devices I found were also installed so they could send the data they received to another server, which Hordak did not teach them.”

Glimmer fixed her tired eyes on Catra. “Back in the Horde, before Entrapta um...joined you guys, there must have been other people who worked on your bots? Aside from Hordak?”

“Yeah,” Catra answered, unsure of exactly what her friend was thinking. “I don’t really know who though. When I first got promoted in the Horde I was a little preoccupied with…”  _ Capturing Adora. Beating the living daylights out of the people I now consider to be friends. Trying to get the attention of the abusive bitch who raised me. _ “...other things.”

“So since we know that there are probably ex-Horde members working with the Dark Queen then it’s probably safe that one of them is responsible for the update. And probably whoever did the upgrades is taking Hordak’s class.”

Catra frowned. “It’s possible. I didn’t recognize any faces when I tried out the class that one time, but it’s not like I knew everyone in the entire Horde. There were thousands of us.”

“There’s a class later today” Bow pointed out. “You should come too Catra, and we can see if anyone seems suspicious, or if you recognize anyone.”

“Ooooh,” Entrapta said excitedly. “Like a sleuthing mission, how exciting.”

Catra considered for a moment. She didn’t exactly relish any time she had to spend in Hordak’s presence. She’d actually been interested in the tech classes herself when they’d first started and had gone to the first one under Entrapta’s tutelage. Five minutes into Hordak’s first class she’d walked out. 

Now she satisfied her curiosity by getting Bow to teach her things when they both had spare time, something she knew he enjoyed anyways since Adora and Glimmer couldn’t really follow any of the tech stuff and he liked having someone else to talk to about it. Sometimes she also hung out with Entrapta when she worked in her lab on days Hordak wasn’t there, though a lot of that went over Catra’s head. 

In the end, Catra couldn’t really figure out a good reason not to go. It was the only lead they really had at this point. So a couple hours later Catra left a note for Adora, who was still asleep, and Glimmer transported her and Bow to Dryll for the start of class. 

They were the first two in the lab that had been set up as a classroom, with rows of large desks and chairs facing a large blackboard at the front. Catra automatically took a seat at the back of the room. She expected Bow to take a seat beside her, but he was hanging back a bit awkwardly near the front of the class. 

Catra raised an eyebrow. “What? You embarrassed to be seen with me or something?”

Bow laughed. “I just usually sit up here.”

“Ugh of course you do. You big nerd.”

“And it will probably look suspicious if I randomly sit somewhere else.” 

“Well it’s a lot easier to spy on the rest of the class when you can actually see them.”

“That’s...a good point. I guess we’ll just sit separately?”

“It won’t look weird that we’re not sitting together?”

Bow shrugged. “It’s not like most of the people here know we’re friends.”

Catra sighed dramatically, kicking her feet up on the desk. “Well we were friends. I don’t know if we will be now that you’re too embarrassed to even be seen with me.”

Bow shot her a fake-hurt expression, then came over to sit on the desk in front of her. “I guess I might as well sit here while we wait for everyone else to arrive. Would probably look strange if we were just sitting in silence.”

“I’m not so sure. This is a tech class. Aren’t most of the students even more nerdy than you?”

“You literally wanted to take this class before Hordak took over teaching.”

“Ah yes but I’m the exception to the rule. I’m the cool kid. Hence sitting at the back of the class.”

Bow smirked. “So I guess you weren’t cool when you were a kid, eh?”

Catra tilted her head to the side, part in confusion, part as a challenge. “What are you trying to say there Arrow Boy?”

“Weeeell whenever Adora used to tell stories about school in the Horde you always seemed to be sitting beside her. And knowing Adora I highly doubt she was sitting at the back of the class.”

Catra glared at Bow, but that only made him laugh. So she crossed her arms defensively and mumbled. “Fine, Adora is  _ my  _ exception to the rules.”

That comment only made Bow laugh harder, and she was about to stand up and smack him, but then she noticed someone walking in. Bow must have seen something in the look on her face, because he broke off his laughter and turned to look at the door. 

“Catra,” came a deep, almost mechanical voice. 

“Hordak.”

“Entrapta has briefed me on your...mission. Do try not to destroy this lab like you did my last one.”

“No promises.”

They glared at each other in silence for a long time after that, as Bow murmured something about seeing her after class and other students started to trickle into the room. Catra felt a small spark of triumph that Hordak was the first to look away.

***

Class started uneventfully, Hordak went over a lot of theory to begin with, most of which she only partially understood, especially since she was only half listening as she scanned the class for suspects. She didn’t recognize anyone from her time in the Horde, and nobody was doing anything strange that she could pick up on though, just listening to Hordak rambling on like a bunch of nerds.

When the lecture portion of class ended, they were tasked with building a a simple circuit that attached a bunch of lightbulbs to a power source. It was pretty easy given the ample knowledge Catra had picked up from Entrapta and Bow, so she managed to finish before most of the other students, leaving her a good half hour of class to keep observing everyone else. She was about to strike up an exploratory conversation with the girl sitting next to her in the hopes of gleaning more information about the other students when Entrapta showed up.

“Catra!” The princess squealed as she walked excitedly into the room. “I have something to show you!”

“Ummm...can’t it wait until after class Entrapta? I’m kind of busy.”

That comment earned Catra a blank stare. “But you’re done making your circuit already.”

Catra rolled her eyes. “Fine.” It wasn’t like she could say much more without drawing attention to herself. 

“Yay!”

She followed Entrapta out of the room, and once she was sure they were out of earshot she stopped the princess. “I’m supposed to be keeping an eye on the students, remember?”

“Oh. Riiiiight. Well this will only take a second. I’m really excited to show you this!” She resumed her quick pace down the hall, walking on the edges of her pigtails to speed herself along.

Sighing, Catra followed. Entrapta led her to a table in the back corner of her lab, and gestured excitedly at something. Catra’s eyes widened when they fell upon the object. She hadn’t ever expected to see that again. 

“It’s your mask!” Entrapta said, unnecessarily. 

Catra took a step backwards, unsure about how to feel. Considering it was something she used to wear every day, a design she knew had inspired She-Ra’s new look, she surprisingly hadn’t thought about it in months. The last time she’d seen it had been before she’d been chipped.

“Where did you find it?”

“It was on Prime’s abandoned ship. I was looking through his collection of objects he’d conquered from other planets, and there it was. And that’s not all — did you know it’s magic?”

Catra felt a sharp laugh escape her. “Entrapta, it’s just a stupid mask.” 

The princess shook her head. “It  _ was  _ just a mask. Now there’s definitely some kind of magic.”

“That doesn’t make any sense.”

Entrapta shrugged. “That’s what the data says.”

Catra stared at the mask uneasily. Her relationship with magic, particularly runestone magic, was tenuous at best. Sure, maybe she was friends with a bunch of princesses now. Maybe she was dating She-Ra. But she’d always remember the pain of Shadow Weaver’s powers zapping through her body. The fear that one day if she stepped too far out of line that Shadow Weaver might decide she’d had enough and wipe Catra’s memory, or worse, Adora’s. The heart of Etheria almost taking Adora away from her forever.

Ok. Maybe the last one was more the fault of the First Ones than of magic, but still. Catra didn’t want anything to do with it.

Entrapta however, did not share these concerns. She picked up the mask and held it towards Catra. “Here, you should see if it responds to you! Maybe since you’ve worn it all these years you’ll have some kind of connection to the magic.”

Catra tried to back away, but she wasn’t fast enough. In her excitement, Entrapta kept thrusting the mask towards Catra, clearly not reading the panic on her face, and the mask accidentally brushed against one of Catra’s fingers, freezing her in her tracks. 

Something indescribable rushed through her. It wasn’t good or bad necessarily, at least she didn’t think so. If anything, it just felt...like something she’d always been meant to feel. And then her fingers were moving to grab the mask, and she had it in her both hands, the new sensation wrapping around her arms like soft fingers caressing her skin. She pressed the mask to her face, and her entire body was flooded with a feeling of peaceful power, both a part of her and yet something more.

_ Catraaaa _ . A voice ricocheted through her mind, like the echoes of someone shouting into a canyon. Then it spoke again, steadier this time. Stronger.  _ We’ve been waiting for you. _

She could feel the energy coursing through her veins. Her heartbeat sped up, her fingers were practically shaking with the mystical energy.

_ It’s been centuries since the magicats have been able to claim a princess.  _

As the last word reverberated through her mind, Catra snapped back to her senses, She ripped off the mask and dropped it, wincing at the sound of metal hitting the floor. She stared fearfully at where it had fallen.

What. The. Fuck.

When she looked up, Entrapta’s eyes were as wide as her own felt. “Wooow! What happened?”

Catra swallowed, trying to brush off whatever she’d just felt. “What do you mean? It’s just a stupid mask.”  _ Nothing happened, _ she tried to convince herself.  _ My head was playing tricks on me. Clearly living with princesses is starting to finally drive me crazy. _

“You started glowing when you touched the mask. That’s not nothing.” Entrapta had pulled out a magnifying glass. “This is fascinating. I’d like to record some more observations if you’d just pick up the mask again— “

“No! I’m not—” Catra broke off as her ears picked up on a mechanical sound moving towards them. She looked down to see a small robot scuttling across the floor. “What’s that Entrapta?”

Entrapta crouched down in front of the tiny bot, her attention easily diverted away from the mask. She twisted her head to the side as she examined the bot. Catra focused on forgetting what had just happened, taking deep breaths, and trying to pay attention to the present.

Entrapta held out her hand, the bot crawled onto it, and she giggled in response. “Looks like I’ve made a new friend!”

“A  _ new _ friend? That’s not one of your bots?” 

“Nope! Ooooh I wonder where she came from!”

Catra rolled her eyes and took a few steps backward. This day was turning out to be entirely too weird. “Maybe you should put it down if you don’t know where it came from,” she hissed. 

“Why?” Entrapta had flipped the bot upside down in her hands, studying something underneath its body as its tiny metal legs flailed around pathetically. “It’s not dangerous. Judging by the design it’s just meant to be gathering data for someone. See this—” she pointed at a little circle on the front of the bot “—is a camera. In fact it’s the same type of design I found on the clones.” She flipped the bot around again slowly, her eyes scanning its surface. “It doesn’t seem to have any audio capturing abilities though. And unlike the clones there’s no direct transmission capabilities in this bot, so the person who sent it won’t be able to see the pictures until they get home and upload them to their server.”

“So whoever brought this bot here belongs to is probably the student we’re looking for who’s working for the Dark Queen. And they sent the bot here to your lab, probably trying to take pictures of more of your work.”

“Exactly!”

A plan formed quickly in Catra’s mind. “So if we let the bot go and watch whoever it returns to, we’ll find out which student is working for the Dark Queen.”

“Oooooh yes. Good idea!”

So that was one problem down. Identifying the spy. A quick tracker pad call to Brightmoon and She-Ra would be here to help keep the spy from leaving. But even if they did manage to capture them, there was no guarantee of getting answers. And it would probably be noticed when they didn’t return. As much as Catra hated it, their best bet was letting the spy go until they had a better plan for how to handle them. But maybe there was another way to get more information.

“Entrapta, can you attach a tracking device to the bot? Quickly, before the class is over and whoever brought it here notices it’s taking too long?”

The princess’s eyes widened. “Oooh, so we can track the bot back to the Dark Queen’s base?” She jumped up excitedly. “Give me ten minutes!”

“Perfect.”

Catra returned to class after that, doing her best not to register the fact that she could still feel the mask’s power within her. It wasn’t as strong as it had been when she’d first felt it, but it was a constant presence in the back of her consciousness. An unnerving presence. An unwanted presence. She had more important things to deal with.

She waited at her desk at the back of the room, ears poised to pick up on the sound of the returning bot. Eventually her ears pricked up, and her eyes followed the bot to a pale skinny boy’s desk across the room. The bot crawled into his bag, and Catra looked away quickly so as not to alarm the spy to the fact he’d been caught. 

A few minutes later she let her gaze sweep over him, briefly assessing. He was a skinny pale man with dark hair and circles under his eyes. Definitely not much of a fighter. He looked like he rarely got out of the lab. She was pretty sure she’d remembered Hordak referring to him as Theo when he’d asked a question earlier. 

A quick swirl of anger rushed through Catra. This guy, albeit indirectly, was somehow responsible for her injuries last week, and now she was choosing to let him go. It was smart, but that didn’t mean she liked it. 

She spent the last ten minutes of class staring stubbornly at the front of the class, counting down the minutes. Only when the students finally finished filing out of the room, save for her and Bow, did she finally relax.

Bow walked over to her desk. “So, I didn’t notice anything. Did you and Entrapta find something?” 

“Yeah. Let’s call Glimmer.”

***

Glimmer and Adora, who for some reason was in She-Ra form, teleported in ten minutes later. 

“Hi guys!” Adora greeted them. She was practically bouncing up and down with pent up energy or something, and as soon as she greeted them she started wandering around the classroom, eyes trying to take in everything at once. At least she looked liked she’d managed to get some rest after last night.

Catra shot Glimmer a quick look, silently asking  _ what the fuck? _

The queen, who unlike Adora looked as though she hadn’t slept in years, shrugged. “I don’t know, she’s been in She-Ra form since she woke up an hour ago. At least she’s not training obsessively anymore? So...progress maybe.”

_ Maybe _ . Catra shot a quick look over at her girlfriend, who was poking at one of the circuits a few desks away. Then she turned back to her friends. She’d deal with the crazy hyperactive blonde after their strategic planning session was over.

So Catra explained about the bot and the plan to track it to the Dark Queen’s main base, then she and her friends started discussing the steps they wanted to take from there. Despite how Adora had wanted so badly to be more involved in their plans, she didn’t seem to have much interest in participating in this discussion, although Catra was pretty sure she was still sort of paying attention as she paced around like a maniac. Apparently She-Ra was only really interested in contributing to the sort of plans that involved her smashing up her enemies.

Catra didn’t say anything about the mask, and thankfully Entrapta was too wrapped up in their current conversation to bring it up. Catra had almost managed to convince herself that if she ignored the new feeling inside her it would eventually go away. She didn’t need the extra complication in her life.

“Ok,” Glimmer said after a while. “But how do we know that the bot will lead us back to the Dark Queen’s main base of operations. I’m sure her group has multiple locations where people report back to.”

“That’s true,” Catra replied, “We won’t know for sure. But at least we’ll have some sort of location that we can stake out. My idea is that if the bot comes back next week, we can attach our own camera to it that can send us back some data from a distance. Entrapta said that if she prepares things ahead of time she can quickly switch out some of the hardware to do that. Maybe even set up the bot to record audio for us too.”

There was more discussion about this, with Entrapta going off on several tangents regarding the intricate details of the tech that would accomplish her goal. Catra mostly just listened, offering a bit of input when prompted, but she was satisfied that she’d contributed enough to the plan already.

All of a sudden a soft  _ THUNK _ came from the side of the room, where Adora as She-ra had been pacing. Judging by their lack of reaction, it was too quiet for Glimmer, Bow and Entrapta to hear, but Catra’s ears picked up on it. She turned to see her girlfriend rubbing the back of her head. One of the low-hanging ceiling lamps was swinging beside her. Catra tried to glare, because really, what did Adora expect when she insisted on prancing around eight feet tall for no reason, but then her eyes caught sight of the muscles on She-ra’s arms, and she found herself zoning out. Imagining those arms picking her up and throwing her against the wall...

“Um, Catra?” Glimmer’s question brought her back to the conversation at hand. “You have anything to add?”

Anything to add? She probably _should_ have had something to say, right? She was about to turn back to the group when suddenly She-ra’s figure turned towards her, and the flawless eight foot tall warrior princess who for _some reason had taken out her sword_ caught her girlfriend staring. And then her stupid perfect beautiful smug little face quirked up into a smirk. A smirk that was so quintessentially _Adora_ that Catra was worried she might just melt right there on spot. How the hell did her girlfriend go from being an absolute clutz to a cocky as all hell mistress of seduction in a split second? Adora raised an eyebrow and twirled her sword casually, which was weirdly hot. Why was playing with a weapon so hot? And Catra just _knew_ from that expression that she’d been caught ogling her girlfriend like a piece of meat and now Adora was toying with her.  
Catra snapped her gaze back to the group surrounding her, taking a breath to keep her fur from rising was she registered the amused glances from Glimmer and Bow. At least Entrapta didn’t seem to notice.

“No Glimmer, nothing to add. It all sounds great.”

She tried to pay attention to the rest of the decision-making process. She really did. She tried to remind herself that this was  _ her _ plan, it was a good plan, it was their only plan. She probably had more reason to be invested in this than anyone else did. But she swore that for the rest of that conversation she could  _ feel _ Adora staring her down from behind. She could see Adora’s smirk in the corner of her mind. And eventually she heard slow steps walking towards her from behind. Saw out of the corner eye how She-ra’s lithe body effortlessly hoisted itself up to sit on a nearby desk. Just out of Catra’s reach but close enough that Catra could hear her breathing. And fuck if that breathing wasn’t  _ taunting  _ her. 

***

When Glimmer teleported them back to Bright Moon, Catra was still reeling from Adora’s damn smirk. When she and Adora locked eyes, Catra was assured that she wasn’t the only one still caught up in that energy. The blonde was still in She-Ra form for some reason that was starting to seem to Catra like a twisted form of foreplay. At least she’d put the sword away. And her smile was a little less teasing now and a little more...exactly how Catra felt inside. Like she was being undone by the other girl’s gaze.

“So do you guys want to head to dinner?“ Bow asked. Catra had to hold in an eye roll. Count on Arrow Boy not to pick up on the sexual tension right in front of him. 

Adora flushed. “Actually Bow, I think—“

“We’ll meet you there later,” Catra interrupted impatiently. “There’s something else we have to do first.”

Catra took Adora’s hand, dragging her along towards their room and laughing as she heard Glimmer making exaggerated gagging sounds from behind them. Caught up in the adrenaline rushing through her, Catra had managed to push all thoughts of the mask from her mind. Her brain had room for exactly one thought, and that thought was Adora.

When they got to the room, Adora wasted no time shutting the door behind them, and seconds later She-Ra’s strong arms were lifting Catra by the thighs. Catra wrapped her legs around She-Ra’s torso as Adora pressed her against the wall. Catra’s hands reached out hungrily and pulled Adora’s face in for a kiss that left them both breathless, quite a feat since Catra wasn’t entirely sure She-Ra even technically needed to breathe. 

Adora leaned in for another kiss, one that was softer and slower, but no less passionate. That kiss must have broken her concentration, because partway through Catra felt herself sliding down the wall as her girlfriend returned to Adora’s height, and in order not to break the kiss Catra had to quickly leap to the ground as Adora staggered, trying to adjust to Catra’s weight in her arms in the absence of She-Ra’s strength. 

When Catra finally pulled away, a flushed face stared back at her, one that Catra knew almost as well as her own. The one that reminded her of the feeling of home. While She-Ra’s muscles, her height, and her hair were impressive, enough to get Catra’s blood racing, for moments like this she always preferred looking at Adora’s face. The blonde had asked her once, whether she’d had interest in having sex with She-Ra’s form, and Catra had joked back about how that didn’t even make sense. How could you take off clothes that were literally made of magic? And besides, wouldn’t a naked She-Ra be too much for the Universe to handle? The truth was that it just wasn’t the face she’d fallen in love with. 

So no. Catra only ever wanted  _ Adora _ like this. 

Adora’s face quirked up into a cocky grin as she grabbed Catra’s hand, pulling her towards the bed as she backed towards it. A few feet away Catra stopped, pulling the blonde towards her and reaching to unzip her jacket. Red fabric fell onto the floor, and Adora reached down to pull off her shirt as well, revealing a sleek black sports bra underneath. Catra inhaled quickly, and felt her face mirror Adora’s mischievous grin.

Adora pulled Catra back the rest of the way to the bed, lying back when she got there and pulling Catra on to of her. Straddling her girlfriend, she felt hands tugging at the bottom of her shirt, and reached down to pull it off of herself. When she looked back down at Adora, the face looking back at her reflected everything Catra was feeling inside. Stars, how had she gotten this lucky?

Adora pulled her back into another kiss, and amongst the hands moving across her back, the rest of Catra’s thoughts melted away.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Et voila! As usual, hope you enjoyed! 
> 
> Catradora are ending this chapter off in a much better place than they were earlier in the story. Who knows how long that will last...Muahaha. And who knows what the deal is with Catra's mask? So weird...Anyways, I loved writing Bow and Catra's friendship in this chapter. I think I wrote his dialogue a little snarkier than what would probably be considered as in character for him, but I kind of like the idea that some of her sass has rubbed off on him haha. 
> 
> Also: I have this idea that when Catra sees She-ra’s form she refers to her as She-ra, and similarly if she’s describing characteristics or skills that Adora only possesses in She-ra form but then when Catra sees her FACE, all she sees is Adora. Or if she’s describing Adora’s personality it’s always Adora. So if the name switching seems a little odd in this chapter that’s why 
> 
> Stay tuned for more soon!!


	5. Voices dancing through my head

The next few days passed relatively uneventfully. Entrapta had tracked the bot’s signal to a site near the border of the Crimson Waste, but a preliminary survey of the area with some of her drones had revealed nothing of significance. Presumably the entrance to whatever base was stationed there was well camouflaged, maybe even hidden by magic since they didn’t know exactly what they were dealing with. Catra and Glimmer had spent hours—although it had felt like days—weighing the pros and sending a group out to explore in person, but eventually they’d agreed it would be better to wait for more information before making a move. 

Meanwhile, the clones seemed to have slowed down their activity for the time being. Presumably the Dark Queen’s forces were recuperating from the recent damage that the Princess Alliance had inflicted, or maybe just biding their time before acting on some larger plan. Catra was trying her best not to overthink things. 

The Rebellion sent out a couple patrols a day to surveil various parts of Etheria, each made up of a few princesses. With her promise to Adora in mind, Catra made sure to let her girlfriend take the lead on a good number of those patrols, while she herself hung back at Bright Moon, helping Glimmer out with strategy. A part of Catra was getting antsy about all the inaction, but she was so busy she didn’t have much time to fret. 

A significant amount of her time was also going towards planning a ball of all things. They were nearing the one year anniversary of Horde Prime’s defeat, and the ball planned for Saturday was to be a celebration of that. Glimmer had inflicted the majority of the event planning burden on Catra, which she was certain was some kind of personal punishment for all the damage she’d inflicted during the war. Nevermind all the actual reparations she’d been helping with over the last year and all the amends she’d continue to make for the rest of her life. Glimmer adding the role of party-planning to the list of tasks associated with Catra’s job as Bright Moon’s official strategist had been the queen’s last laugh. 

With all of the insanity, Catra had barely had enough time to pull together the last of her plans to celebrate her _own_ anniversary. Well, hers and Adora’s, which technically coincided with the day of the ball, but they had agreed to celebrate the day before so that their time together wouldn’t be overshadowed by the event. Technically Adora was taking care of most of that, since she’d wanted to and it was helpful for Adora to feel like she had something to focus on right now, but Catra still wanted to do something special. It had taken her way too long to realize how lucky she was to have the blonde in her life, and she’d be damned if she was going to take that for granted now.

And that’s how Catra found herself on Thursday night, frantically painting the final details on a silly little figurine she’d made for Adora. It was a wind-up toy of She-Ra that she’d put together with some help from Bow for the electronics. When you wound the key the figurine would raise its hand into the air, and which point a sword would pop out of said hand as the figurine would shout “ _For the Honor of Grayskull”_ in a squeaky voice and then march around swinging its sword until it ran out of juice. It was crude, but Adora would love it. Catra buying random She-Ra merchandise from all around Etheria for Adora had become somewhat of an inside joke for the two of them. 

Regrettably, painting didn’t keep her mind that busy, and she felt her thoughts wandering to the strange new feelings of power her old mask had imbued upon her. It had become a background constant in her life, in the same way that a person could tune out a dripping tap or how a body wouldn’t register the feeling of clothing on their skin throughout the day unless they focused on it. Sometimes Catra would feel a spark of power now and then, especially if she was thinking about it, but typically it was easy to ignore.

She still hadn’t told anyone, in large part because she was worried that if she said something then Adora and her friends would talk her into finding out more about it, which she really didn’t want to do. With everything else going on it had been more than easy to put off thinking about it until later. Unfortunately, later had decided to become now.

She had just put the final stroke of paint on the tiny She-Ra then picked it up to admire her work when she heard the voice in her head again.

_Princess, when are you coming to claim your power?_

She nearly dropped the figurine, but managed to set it back down on the desk with shaky hands. A feeling of panic bubbled inside her momentarily, and she sat there, half-frozen in trepidation, fearing the voice would sound again.

About a minute passed, and no more foreign whispers had trespassed through her mind. Catra let out a sigh and let herself relax. She was exhausted. She’d probably imagined it. 

She crawled in next to Adora, who was mumbling something about cupcakes in her sleep, and let the familiarity of her girlfriend lull her to sleep.

***

“Stars, Adora, aren’t you ready yet?”

It was Saturday evening, and Catra was leaning on their bed dramatically, ready for the ball and waiting for her girlfriend to finish getting dressed. Hopefully some time before their next anniversary.

Yesterday had pretty much been a perfect day. After enjoying breakfast in bed, Adora had taken Catra to this cool little place near Dryll that had a bunch of weird little partially enclosed metal seats on wheels that were apparently known as Go-Karts. They got to race them around a track, and Catra was still thinking about the thrill of the wind rushing around her and the smirks she and Adora had exchanged every time one of them had overtaken the other.

Also, Catra’s stomach had done literal somersaults at the sight of Adora shaking out her lightly tangled blonde hair after pulling her head out of her helmet. Her girlfriend was hot.

They’d returned to Bright Moon after that for a picnic dinner on one of the hills outside the castle, where they’d lain until the first stars had started to peak through the sky, talking about everything and nothing, stealing kisses and laughter from each other like they had an infinite supply.

The things they’d done after that, back in their room...Those had been pretty perfect too.

“I’m coming out now,” Adora shouted from the closet, and Catra sat up abruptly, mind returning to the present.

Catra couldn’t help but laugh at Adora’s expression as she walked back into their room, dressed in the outfit Glimmer had picked out for her to wear to the ball. It was an ombre dress with a sweetheart neckline that faded from royal blue at the top to white at the bottom, with a tiny silver belt cinched around her waist and matching silver gladiator-type sandals. She looked amazing — Catra hadn’t really paid much attention when Glimmer had insisted that the two of should try to “change up their colour scheme”, but now she had to admit that it worked for the blonde. She was radiant, like...well…a princess. 

She also looked like she absolutely hated it.

Adora frowned at Catra’s reaction. “See, I _told_ Glimmer this made me look stupid.” She walked over to the mirror, pressing down on her skirt as if she could flatten it into pants with her own sheer will.

Catra swallowed her laughter and walked up to place her hands on Adora’s waist from behind, leaning her chin on one of the blonde’s muscular shoulders. “You don’t look stupid. You look beautiful. But you also look really uncomfortable.”

Catra smiled as she watched Adora’s reflection scrunch up its nose in displeasure. “I’m just never going to get used to dresses.”

“I _told_ you that you don’t need to wear them if you don’t like them. Tell Glimmer to fuck off. That’s what I did.” 

Catra had picked out her own outfit after Adora’s dress had been picked out. It was a tight-fitting royal blue pantsuit with a deep V-neck and an attached sort of cape that hung down over the sides of her otherwise bare arms down to her wrists. There were three decorative silver buttons down each side of the bodice and she’d paired it with her favourite type of footwear — none at all. She’d been intrigued by the piece when she’d first tried it on, enjoying the way it fit hugged her body but unsure if it was really her style. Adora’s look when she’d walked out of the changeroom had been the selling factor.

“It’s not that I hate them. I just...I don’t know. It feels strange to wear something just because it’s nice. Clothing is supposed to be practical, you know?” Catra rolled her eyes at that, but Adora just booped her on the nose — she was absolutely the only person who could do that to Catra and get to keep all their fingers — and kept talking. “I’m sure I’d be just as uncomfortable in any other kind of formal clothing. Besides, Glimmer has so much fun picking out dresses for me to wear, I don’t want to take that away from her.”

Catra debated arguing the point further, but it was a slippery slope between arguing that Adora should put herself first more and slipping into some more taboo topic that centered around their dysfunctional childhoods. Seeing as Catra wanted to enjoy tonight, she decided to let it slide. 

She offered Adora her arm. “Come on dummy, let’s go.”

***

 _Three minutes_. That’s how long Catra and Adora had been at the ball when Glimmer showed up and whisked Catra away to help her sweet talk (read: blackmail) them into coughing up some money towards Etheria’s rebuilding efforts. 

Normally Catra didn’t mind this part of her job, but tonight was supposed to be a party, so as soon as she secured a few more donations and it was polite for her to slip away she excused herself, winding through the crowd of people mingling and dancing in search of Adora. After a couple minutes of searching, she felt her stomach growl, and decided to reroute her search towards the food table. She was loading a bunch of tiny sandwiches onto a plate when a voice from behind her made her freeze. 

“Hey there kitten.” 

Catra turned around and leaned back against the table as she sized up the newcomer. “Double Trouble.” 

The shape shifter was wearing a sharp black tux over what Catra thought of as their usual chameleon-like form, although she still had no idea if it was really their true form or simply the way they wanted the world to see them. 

She was unsure how she felt about seeing them after all this time. She honestly hadn’t given them much thought since the end of the war. The last time she’d seen them had been at her absolute lowest point, after having been betrayed by all of her friends and her plans having fallen apart. As a final twist of the metaphorical knife in her darkened heart, Double Trouble had showed up as a distraction for the Rebellion, proving that Catra — at least the old Catra — couldn’t even buy another person’s loyalty. 

So yeah. Their presence here was bringing up some unwanted feelings. But on the other hand, Catra had always respected them in a strange way. They’d always been exactly who they claimed to be, no more and no less. An ironic quality for someone who made a living impersonating other people.

Double Trouble smiled. “I heard you were dating a princess and all, but I didn’t realize it came with such a glow-up. You look good kitten.”

Catra raised an eyebrow. “You saying I didn’t before?”

The lover of theater clapped their hands together and laughed. “Touche. I just meant you seem like you’re happy here. It’s nice.” Surprisingly, the words seemed genuine. 

“Um. Thanks. You look good too.” Did that count as a compliment for a shapeshifter who could look however they wanted to? Oh whatever, who cared? Catra debated asking them how the hell they’d gotten into the ball in the first place, but she decided it didn’t really matter. Double Trouble _probably_ wasn’t here to cause mayhem, or they’d hardly have shown up as themself. “How’ve you been?” she asked instead.

“Brilliant, Darling. I’ve joined a new theatre troupe. We perform a re-enactment of how She-Ra saved the world and all. At first I thought it would be quite a dull role. But the story’s so popular that it’s actually pretty lucrative. And turning into an eight-foot tall princess garners a surprising amount of admirers.”

Catra burst out laughing at that. “They cast _you_ as Adora?”

“I know, right? But it’s a challenge to play a role so far from your usual personality. And I did have some experience impersonating her already.” Catra shuddered at that memory, but Double Trouble continued, seeming not to notice. “And then that _kiss_ at the end.” 

Catra hoped her blush wasn’t as obvious as it felt. While they’d been speaking, Double Trouble had leaned an elbow casually on Catra’s shoulder. She’d tried not to tense too much at the invasion of her personal space. She knew Double Trouble didn’t mean anything by it, except maybe to purposefully make her feel uncomfortable, and if so she wasn’t about to give them the satisfaction. 

“Hilarious.”

“Oh come on kitten. You used to be so much more fun.”

Catra rolled her eyes. “Some people actually grow up.”

Double Trouble feigned a yawn, waving their hand daintily in front of their face. “How dull.”

“Tracking down a rebel group of clones is dull?”

“Hmmm. Not that, no. Lots of people are whispering about that. Wondering what’s taking all you princesses so long to deal with the threat.”

“I’m not a princess,” Catra hissed. “And we’re working on it.”

“Sure, sure…” Double Trouble looked around lazily, as though growing bored of the conversation. “Look kitten, it’s been lovely catching up, but I’m gonna head back out for another dance. If you ever need a well-disguised spy to gain some more intel for you though...Well let’s just say that espionage pays much better than the theatre.” They winked as they backed away into the crowd.

Sighing, Catra quickly shoved a couple of the single tiny sandwiches into her mouth, then abandoned the rest of her food on the buffet table. She pushed all thoughts of work out of her mind and started cutting through the crowd again in search of Adora. 

She’d been wandering for about thirty seconds when somebody bumped into her. She was about to turn around and tell the offender to mind their personal space, but then a familiar voice broke out in apology.

“Ooops, I’m so sorry, I — Catra!!!”

“Adora,” she whined, turning and taking in her clearly very tipsy girlfriend. “You said you were going to wait for me to start drinking.”

“I did!” She waved her glass in the air. “This is a mimosa.”

“I can see that. And what’s a mimosa Adora?”

“Orange juice?” She frowned at her glass. “Bow said it was orange juice.”

“Uh-huh. Mixed with sparkling wine.” Catra plucked the drink from her hand, downing the nearly full glass herself. Adora giggled, and Catra raised an eyebrow. “Exactly how many did you have?”

“Um...one?”

“Adora…”

“And two other ones?”

Catra groaned. “Alright, you’re cut off for now.” She placed the empty glass on the tray of a waiter passing by, then grabbed both of Adora’s hands, pulling her close. “And you owe me a dance.”

***

A few hours later, Catra tucked her drunk girlfriend into bed and smiled to herself as she walked away to get ready to sleep herself. It had been one of those nights she’d only ever known since coming to Bright Moon. The kind that felt too good to be true. 

She’d danced with Adora for what felt like hours, but had really been about five songs before she’d given up on the inebriated blonde’s lack of coordination. Then they’d abandoned the dance floor to stuff their faces with mac’n’cheese cups and chocolate covered strawberries. Eventually they’d found their way to a table in corner of the room with a bunch of their other friends. Sea Hawk was drunker than Adora, down on one knee trying to serenade Mermista as the princess desperately pretended she didn’t secretly enjoy it. Perfuma and Scorpia kept sneaking off to the bathroom to make out, as if everyone didn’t already know what they were up to. Glimmer and Catra had then started placing bets on which of the single party-goers would be hooking up with someone before the night’s end. 

So when Catra finally climbed into bed with Adora and promptly fell asleep, it was only right that she woke up halfway through the night with an inexplicable yet profound sense of dread. The Universe demanded balance, and Catra was never allowed to have that much happiness. 

_Catra. She’s coming. She wants to take what’s rightfully yours. You need to get to the mask. Claim your destiny before it’s too late._

It was the mask again. Or the voice in the mask? The voice mystically connected to the mask? Catra didn’t know, but despite not having wanted anything to do with the stupid thing she couldn’t shake the panic that was rising in her now. 

For whatever reason, she knew she could trust the voice. She had to act now. If someone was coming for the mask then she had to get there first. 

She shot a quick look at Adora, then quickly and quietly ran out of the room. For all she knew, Adora was still drunk. She just needed to get to Dryll, fast, and she didn’t think she had time to explain things more than once. 

She ran into the hallway, about to run over to Glimmer’s room, when she saw the queen wandering down the hallway back towards her room, a pint of ice cream in her hands. She jumped when she noticed Catra. 

“What are you—”

“Glimmer! I need you to teleport me to Dryll.”

“What? Catra, it’s the middle of the night.”

“I know, I just—trust me, it’s important.”

“Catra, you’re in pyjamas, are you sure this can’t wait until—”

“Glimmer, please.”

Something in her expression must have gotten through to the other girl, because Glimmer sighed. She placed the ice cream on the floor, balancing a spoon on top of it, then held her hand out to Catra. “This had better be worth it Horde scum. I’ve been waiting on this mint chocolate chip all night.”

Catra grabbed Glimmer’s hand. “Take us to Entrapta’s lab.”

Glimmer teleported them, and Catra tried her best to ignore her usual sense of vertigo that came from teleporting as they arrived. She ran to the back of the lab, to where the mask had been resting previously. 

But now it was gone.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> That’s a wrap on Chapter 5. Mostly fluff in this chapter, but a few little things to move the story forwards. I was going to write Catradora’s anniversary and elaborate on the She-Ra gift joke, but I didn’t want to put in too much that would distract from the actual story, so I might do that as a little one-shot at some point. Anyways, Hope you enjoyed! 
> 
> I’d love to hear what you’re thinking about the story so far, so please comment if you can. <3
> 
> P.S: Here are the photos I based the outfit descriptions on.  
> Catra’s outfit:  
> https://i.pinimg.com/originals/ea/87/94/ea879448b1760a0980d8d7e5e43a86a9.jpg  
> Adora’s dress:  
> https://www.promfy.com/uploads/product/1/7/17004/Charming-blue-to-white-ombre-chiffon-bridesmaid-dress-2.jpg


	6. Not everyone wants to be a princess

“The Dark Queen stole it.” Catra was pacing back and forth across the war room, trying to calm herself down. She’d explained the whole story, from when Entrapta had shown her the mask to how the voice kept speaking to her, then ending with how she’d arrived in Dryll to discover that the mask was missing. So far she’d left out the part about still feeling a connection to the mask’s power, figuring her story sounded crazy enough already. Glimmer, Bow, and Adora had taken seats at the meeting table, faces contorted to reflect various reactions, from disbelief to vexation, as Catra’s chaotic tale came to and end. 

Catra felt like her life was suddenly unbalanced. A feeling of equilibrium she’d apparently grown accustomed over the last year was missing, yanked away as though someone had pulled a rug out from under her and she was still falling. In a sick way, the lack of stability felt more real to Catra than much of the last year had. She’d never been able to take her own happiness for granted, and this was nothing if not proof of why.

As soon as she’d noticed that the mask was missing, she’d started shouting a bunch of obscenities and incomplete explanations, which had woken Entrapta and a pissed-looking Hordak. Glimmer had alternated between stammering apologies about the disturbance and trying to make Catra snap out of her panic. She hadn’t been successful in the latter task, but Catra had managed to pull herself together enough to interrogate a somewhat overwhelmed Entrapta about the missing artifact. The scientist confirmed that she hadn’t been the one to move the mask, nor would any of her staff have had reason to do so. Catra didn’t question that too hard. Even if the mask’s voice hadn’t specified  _ who _ had been coming to take it, she knew it had to have been the Dark Queen.

Glimmer had eventually pieced together enough of Catra’s initial ramblings to realize that their trip had been a lost cause, and had teleported them back to Bright Moon. Catra hadn’t stopped freaking out once they’d returned to the castle, shouting that they had to get the mask back, that they had to go now. It was senseless talk, and mostly she knew that, but a feeling deep in the pit of her stomach was telling her that something was horrifically wrong.

Or maybe she was just finally having some sort of psychotic break. 

She hadn’t really noticed when Glimmer had left her alone in the war room until the queen had returned with Adora and Bow in tow. Adora had initially seemed concerned about Catra’s frantic state, but when the details of the situation had started to slip out, particularly the part where Catra had snuck out in the middle of the night on a potentially dangerous operation without so much as waking Adora, other emotions had overtaken the blonde’s face. 

Now Adora’s lips were pressed into a thin line, and Catra could read her anger from the hard lines of the side of her face as she stubbornly refused to actually look at Catra.

It was all too much. Catra was even too worked up to ignore the now almost familiar feeling of power inside her. It coursed through her in a steady rhythm alongside the blood rushing quickly through her veins. It was intense enough that in that moment, she momentarily forgot her fears surrounding it, instead wanting to  _ use _ the energy somehow. Wanting to do what the mask had suggested, and claim what was hers.

“We don’t know that it was her Catra.” Glimmer sounded exhausted, but Catra was too agitated to feel bad about having dragged her friend halfway across the planet and back during the middle of the night.

“Who else would be powerful enough to break into Dryll without anyone noticing? It has to be her.”

“We don’t even know if she has any powers yet,” Bow pointed out. 

Catra clenched her teeth together. She’d stopped pacing and her eyes now fixed stubbornly on the side of Adora’s head. “I just  _ know _ it was her, ok?”

Adora whipped her head around to look at Catra. Finally. “Oh, you  _ know _ , do you? And how do you know?” She stood up, hands balled into fists. “Did the voices tell you? Or have you developed some mystical ability to tell the future that you’ve also been keeping from us? From  _ me _ ?” 

Catra felt a rush of guilt as Adora’s voice cracked on the last word. “I—”

“Holy fucking Stars.” The unfamiliar sound of Adora cursing made Catra wince. “There  _ is _ something else, isn’t there? How is there still more you’ve been lying about?”

“I wasn’t  _ lying _ .”

“Guys—” Bow interrupted. “This isn’t constructive.” He reached out a tentative hand towards Adora then seemed to think better of it. “Adora,” he said instead, “why don’t we let Catra explain herself?”

Adora didn’t answer, but she sat back down, eyes still fixed on Catra, who had stopped pacing and was standing a few feet away from the table.

“I just...I feel it. When I picked up the mask in Entrapta’s lab last week I felt the energy run through me. I thought it was only attached to the mask, but now I think that maybe it’s attached itself to me. I—” she hesitated, debating whether or not to reveal the rest, but she decided she might as well. Nothing could really be worse than the way Adora was looking at her right now. “—I can still feel it now. And I don’t know how, but I also know it was the Dark Queen. Or one of her minions maybe. I can’t explain how, but I just know she’s behind it.” 

“That’s ridiculous.”

“Says the girl who once abandoned me in the middle of the night to chase after a glowing sword she had a vision about.”

Adora’s eyes somehow narrowed even further. “That’s different. That was—”

“Magic,” Glimmer interjected. Catra tensed at the word. This wasn’t that. It couldn’t be.

But she knew deep down that her friend was right. 

“Look,” Glimmer continued. “We can’t do anything about this right now.” She held up a hand as Catra opened her mouth to protest. “We can’t. We’re all exhausted, and overemotional, and we don’t have enough information. So I suggest that we all go to sleep for now, and in the morning we’ll figure out our next move.” She eyed Catra with an unyielding stare. “Alright?”

“Fine,” Catra agreed unwillingly, her tail thrashing back and forth. Logically, she knew Glimmer was right, but fear and exhaustion were standing in the way of all reason. Catra wanted to tear something to shreds. She wanted to burn down a village. To push everyone away and strike out on her own. 

She took a deep breath, trying to remind herself of the reasons why she didn’t do those things anymore. 

Glimmer and Bow said good night and promptly left the room, leaving her alone with Adora, whose arms were crossed tightly across her chest. She again refused to look at Catra. 

Something about the fact that she was back here with Adora, back in this place of lost trust and feeling like everything she said was wrong...well, something about that made the rest of the tension in Catra deflate. She sunk into the chair next to Adora as exhaustion washed over her and a profound feeling of emptiness dislodged the fear that had been occupying the pit of her stomach. 

“I’m sorry,” she whispered. If she could count the times she’d said that to Adora over the past year then they’d probably have to invent a new numbers system to accommodate her tally. For someone who’d once refused to ever apologize to anyone, she’d done a lot of things that warranted apologies. It killed her to remember all the ways she’d hurt her best friend throughout the years, and yet here she was, doing it again. 

“Why didn’t you tell me?” Adora asked. Catra felt like maybe some of the anger had evaporated from her voice, but perhaps that was merely wishful thinking.

“I don’t know. I didn’t want to worry you, I guess. Everything’s been so crazy lately. And I didn’t want to start another fight—”

“The only reason we we’ve been fighting at all lately is that we weren’t communicating. And your solution to that is to keep more information from me?”

“Well when you put it like that…” Catra smiled weakly, but Adora was not amused. 

Her eyes found Catra’s again, and now that they were only inches apart Catra felt like she could read every inch of mistrust that lined her girlfriend’s face. “You can’t tell me that I push myself too hard, that I rush into battle without thinking, only to turn around and do the exact same thing.”

And Catra had nothing to say to that. 

Adora stood, letting out a long sigh. “Come on. We should get to bed.”

Catra felt her heart lighten a little. “Kind of thought you wouldn’t want to stay with me tonight.” She reached for Adora’s hand, but the other girl pulled away.

“You think I trust you right now not to disappear before morning if I let you out of my sight?” 

Well. Catra supposed she deserved that. 

***

After a few fitful hours of sleep, Catra awoke to see Adora leaning upright against the door to their room, her eyes meeting Catra’s as she sat up in bed.

“Are you actually  _ standing guard _ ?” Catra snapped. Last night she’d felt bad, sure. But this was too much. Catra was pretty sure, judging by the circles under those blue eyes she normally loved to wake up to, that Adora had been there the whole time Catra had been asleep. “How is you not sleeping at all supposed to help me?”

Adora glared back. “I did sleep. While you were traipsing around Etheria apparently.”

“Oh for the love of the Stars,” Catra mumbled. “You’re supposed to be a princess, not a fucking drama queen.” 

She rolled out of bed, grabbed clothes from the dresser, and stormed into their bathroom, slamming the door behind her. She told herself her eyes were only watering because they were dry from lack of sleep.

The day didn’t really get much better from there on in. Bow had come up with the idea that they should visit his dads’ library in search of more information, which Catra agreed was as good a plan as any in the absence of more information. But Glimmer had decided that instead of teleporting it would be good for group morale to walk. They all knew that was merely a pretense to try and force Adora and Catra to talk things out, but it was a failed objective. Adora kept speeding up whenever someone tried walk beside her, and one by one they all gave up on trying to reason with her.

Catra tried to distract herself along the way by listening to Glimmer and Bow’s feeble attempts at cheerful conversation, but her friends hadn’t exactly gotten much sleep the night before either, so instead Catra had mostly her own misery for company as they wandered through the Whispering Woods. 

Bow had called ahead to let his dads know they were on the way, so the squad was greeted by George and Lance, both waving enthusiastically and wrapping the group in a giant hug that even Catra couldn’t pretend she didn’t appreciate. Bow’s dads were really just too wholesome not to love. 

Lance ushered the group towards the seating area near the front of the library and ran off into the kitchen in search of scones. Catra hung back, watching her friends from afar, feeling too restless to sit down like it was any other day. She zoned out a little, not noticing that George had walked up beside her until he started speaking.

“So, I hear a lot’s been going on. How you holding up?”

Catra shrugged. “I’ll be better when I know more about what’s going on.”  _ And when I learn to stop pissing off my girlfriend. _

George smiled sympathetically. “I can understand that. I do hope we can help. This morning we pulled out as many resources as we could find on magicat history and lore.”

Catra frowned. It took her a second to place why the word magicat sounded familiar. “The voice that...the one from the mask,” Catra broke off uncertainly, not knowing exactly what information Bow had passed on to his dads, but George didn’t seem confused, so she continued. “It said something about the magicats...that they wanted to claim a princess or something. But what are they?”

“Hmm.” George rubbed his moustache. “Not so much a what but a who. They were a race of...well essentially humanoid cats that occupied an underground kingdom known as Half Moon.”

Catra felt the fur on her tail rise. “Humanoid cats,” she said blankly. “Like me?” If she had to describe herself it would be as more of a catlike human, but...semantics.

George shook his head. “Not exactly, no. I mean nobody knows for sure, because as far as anyone knows the species died out a few centuries ago, but most accounts stipulate that the magicats were genetically far more closely related to cats than you seem to be. Likely you’re descended from the original magicat species, but it’s hard to say how far back the lineage goes. He paused, then added, “You don’t know anything about your background, do you?” 

Catra shook her head. Not like she wanted to know anything anyways about the people who’d abandoned her in a box for the Horde to find. 

George nodded, continuing. “Right. Well that would probably be helpful, but not necessary. I’m sure we’ll find something anyways. I can show you the books we’ve set aside if you want to get started?”

Catra nodded, letting him lead the way. He showed her to a corner of the library, where a table had been completely overtaken by piles of books. “This isn’t all we have, but these are some of the resources we think might be most helpful. The magicat lore alludes to a mask that connects the magicat queen to her powers. Most historians thought that the mask was a metaphor for how their kingdom being hidden underground protected their power, but in light of recent events...Well maybe there’s more to it. Of course original texts from that time aren’t written in modern Etherian, but these translations are some of the best accounts we have of that period in time.”

“This is...really helpful. Thank you.”

George nodded. “Any time. I should probably head back to the others before Lance starts looking for me, but I’ll try to keep them distracted for a while. I sense that...maybe you could use some time for yourself.” He picked up one of the stacks of books from the table and headed back the way they’d come.

Catra felt more settled after their conversation. She wasn’t used to people understanding her, but George had somehow seemed to be able to read her from the beginning, seeing underneath her usual bravado. Living at Bright Moon she’d gotten used to Micah as a sort of parental figure in her life, but that was often in the context of work. George and Lance had no reason to treat her like she belonged, but they did so anyways. It made Catra wonder what kind of person she might have turned out to be if she’d grown up with parents like them.

George made good on his promise to give her some space, but once the group had been through the stack of books he’d brought out without finding much of significance the group had joined Catra with the rest of the books. Glimmer, Bow, George and Lance had taken chairs at the table, while Adora had stubbornly refused to take the final free chair that was next to where Catra sat, and had instead settled down on the floor with a small pile of books. Catra did her best to ignore how that made her feel.

They’d been at it for probably a couple hours without finding anything, and Catra was about to take a break when she heard a small gasp from the direction of the floor. “Catra, that’s your mask.”

Catra turned around to see what Adora was looking at, and was surprised to see the blonde sliding on her knees across the floor towards Catra. She placed the book on Catra’s lap, leaning in close, her anger apparently momentarily forgotten. 

The picture Adora pointed to depicted an image of a mask that did look just like Catra’s, lying on the ground in front of a giant red crystal of some sort.

“What’s it say?” asked Glimmer. 

Catra cleared her throat, reading from the passage underneath the image.

“ _ The high princess of the magicats was known to be blessed with the powers of Half Moon’s runestone, the Masked Ruby. Historians have long argued that the runestone’s power is masked only in name, but some accounts from that time period suggest that the runestone might have been linked to a physical mask, which imbued the wearer with an additional connection to the runestone’s magic. Although these sources have been difficult to verify, the image above has been repurposed from an ancient magicat source, which may support the latter theory. _ ”

“Wow,” Bow said when she was done. He’d moved so that he was standing behind Catra. “That really does look exactly like your mask. It can’t be a coincidence.”

“It would explain why the Dark Queen was interested in the mask too,” Glimmer added. “If it’s really connected to the power of a runestone, then she must want to take that power for herself.”

Adora looked up at Catra in awe. “And you’re connected to it too now, aren’t you? You said you could still feel the magic, right?”

Catra looked away uncomfortably. “I can feel  _ something _ ,” she mumbled, “But it’s probably nothing. Just some lingering feeling from holding the mask I’m sure.”

“I don’t think so,” Bow said. “Look at the next paragraph -  _ It was hypothesized that a physical connection with the mask could allow any user, not only the designated princess, temporary access to the stone’s magic. But only the high princess could maintain her connection apart from the mask’s presence _ .”

Catra snapped the book closed. “And it also says that the sources of this information might be unreliable.”

Glimmer smirked across the table at her. “Well I think it sounds like Catra’s a princess after all.”

Catra was about to bite back a retort when the voice slipped into her mind again. 

_ Your friends speak the truth Catra. The Masked Ruby has claimed you. As the closest living descendant of the magicats, its power is yours to make use of, princess. _

Something in Catra’s face must have given her away, because Adora was looking at her intently. “That was the runestone talking to you, wasn’t it? What did it say?”

“Nothing.” The words felt too ridiculous to repeat out loud. And there was no way Catra could be a princess with a runestone. This had to be the Universe’s idea of a joke.

Adora was glaring at her now. “Why are you so against this theory? You could be a princess! Imagine how powerful—”

“I don’t want this Adora. I’m not cut out to be a princess.” 

“And why not?”

“Because not everyone wants to be  _ you _ , Adora!” Catra’s voice had risen to a yell, and she realised she’d gone too far. Again. 

Adora snatched the book from Catra’s lap, and carried it out of the room without another word.

*** 

Catra wasn’t entirely sure how things got worse between her and Adora after that, but they did. She should have gone to sleep when they got back to Bright Moon, or maybe gone on a walk to burn off steam. Instead, she let Glimmer drag her into a two-hour meeting with Micah and some officials on a nearby planet that they were planning on visiting to help build diplomatic relations once things calmed down on Etheria. At that point, Catra was so tired she was surprised she hadn’t fallen asleep at the table, but she was also starving, so she wandered down to the dining hall in a half-stupor. 

When she arrived, she realized that while the war room had been in use, her girlfriend had turned the dining room table into some sort of research hub.

“What the fuck are you doing?” Catra asked.

Adora looked up defensively. “I’m figuring out how to get to Half Moon.”

Catra took a seat at the corner of the table, pushing a pile of books that were covering the spot in front of her onto the floor, where they landed with a thud. “Fine. Whatever. Have a nice trip.”

Adora glared. “You’re acting childish.”

“ _ I’m  _ acting childish? You’re not even listening to what I  _ want _ Adora. You’ve just decided you’re right. Because you always have to be right.” Catra wasn’t exactly sure where that outburst had come from. It wasn’t like Adora usually walked around trying to push her opinions onto others. But when she got like this...Catra couldn’t deal with it.

She’d get an idea stuck in her head and latch on with everything she had, never thinking twice about how it affected anyone else around her. Maybe Catra was just annoyed that she put so much effort into being a better person, into taking the feelings of those she loved into account, even setting regular appointments with the therapist that Perfuma had recommended her, when it felt like Adora didn’t try at all. When sometimes Adora and their friends acted like Adora got a free pass. Just because she was, you know, Adora. Who could do no wrong. 

Too many of the emotional scars around Catra’s heart were proof that wasn’t true.

She hadn’t thought of Catra when she’d avoided her for a week after watching her nearly die. She hadn’t thought about Catra when she’d found the stupid sword. 

All of these wounds that Catra had thought she’d moved past were opening up again now, and she couldn’t hold everything in. 

Catra reached across the table and grabbed the book right out of Adora’s hand, letting it fall to the floor with the others. “I told you I don’t want this Adora.”

Adora stood, leaning towards Catra with fury blazing in her eyes. “I’m just trying to find out more information so that you have it if you change your mind.”

“That’s bullshit. You’re doing this because you’re  _ hoping _ I’ll change my mind.”

“So what if I am?”

“What is it Adora? I’m still not good enough for you?”

“Catra, no. That’s not—” Adora’s voice was small all of a sudden, and Catra almost felt bad about going on. Maybe she’d regret it later. 

“You know what you don’t do to someone you  _ love _ ? You don’t try to constantly change them. You don’t make them feel inferior to you for having different priorities. You don’t project your own issues onto them because you haven’t accepted the fact that they’re not the only one who need therapy.”

“I don’t—” 

“YOU’RE NOT PERFECT ADORA.”

Adora crumpled back into her chair, tears streaming down her face. “You think I don’t know that?” Her voice wavered as she spoke.

The rational side of Catra’s mind was begging her to shut up, but she opted not to listen. “You don’t act like you know. You act like I’m a problem for  _ Perfect Adora _ to fix.”

Adora was shaking now, the glint of anger back in her eyes. “Shut up Catra. You’re an idiot if that’s what you think. You almost died. In front of me. And I couldn’t do a damn thing. So yeah, I  _ know _ I’m not perfect.” She gave a strangled laugh. “And yeah, if you have a chance to be a princess, with a runestone. With more power that could keep you safe if I fail you  _ again _ ? Yeah, you’re damn right I’m hoping you take it.” She stood up, picking the book Catra had taken from her off of the floor and hugging it to her chest. “Sorry I fucking care,” she whispered before storming away.

Catra felt sobs shaking her body before Adora had even left the room.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ….So don’t hate me, but this has literally been one of my favourite chapters to write so far (And I have about ten chapters mostly done). I really wasn’t even planning on that last scene but I realized the tension wasn’t exactly as high as I wanted it at the end of the library scene and then I just started writing and it all came out so easily? So apparently I’m sadistic and love torturing my favourite fictional characters. It’s fine. Totally fine. (But I promise they’re going to stop this soon. They’re both just really stressed and taking it out on each other. They’ll be a little pissy for a couple chapters but then they make up and stop losing their shit on each other, I swear...Not that they won't have other things to deal with. Muahaha.)
> 
> A couple minor notes: 1) I've seen a lot of debate about whether Catra is or isn't a magicat in the reboot, but to be honest she just looks completely different from the 80s version magicats, so I decided she was probably related to them in some sense but with some other lineage mixed in. 2) I know most people have Perfuma playing therapist for Catra and Adora after the war, and while I think she'd certainly be able to help Catra with some of her anger issues, I've never really seen her as like a therapist therapist, since she's not actually trained for that or anything, and I assume Etheria is developed enough to have actual therapists, so ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯
> 
> Anyways please let me know what you think! :) Comments = Fanfic Writers Crack


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